Happy Anniversary!

Today is Jon and my 13th wedding anniversary. It is amazing how time flies!

I remember the first time I really took note of him way back in 1994. I was out for a walk and saw this young man (whom I had met at the college & career group at church) walking down the street in bare feet with a cordless phone in hand... (I guess he was testing the phone and the distance he could go with it!) I didn't know that he was living just a street over from me so that was the first time it registered with me that he was nearby.


He says he knew I was the girl he wanted to marry when he saw me smile. Aw. What a sweetie. And he proceeded to make the moves pretty fast:-) I was only 18 years old and he was 22 years old, on the lookout for a bride:-)

Before I knew it he was sweeping me off my feet by asking me out on a "date" at 10:30pm one night out to McDonalds for free fries (a perk we got with our university ID card at that time)! What romance!:-) It was a unique first date:-) We certainly had lots of fun.

He told me he loved me within 2 weeks of "dating":-) He was REALLY on the lookout for a bride! Also within the first two weeks of dating he wanted me to learn to cut his hair! LOL I can't believe he actually trusted me with that job! His other longtime female friends had been cutting his hair for the past number of years so they showed me how to cut his hair one evening...and I've done it ever since! That, combined with the McDonald's free fries date, certainly showed me how thrifty he was...a quality I appreciated and still do:-) We work well together in that regard:-)

We enjoyed many walks together, put many puzzles together (there's something so calm and relaxing about doing a puzzle together and just chatting), and spent much time at the university together as we were both in the faculty of education at the time. And we fell in love and really became the best of friends very quickly.

Within 11 months of dating, he popped the question in a very unusual way...

One afternoon he came by with a stuffed teddy bear for me. He didn't usually bear gifts and I was thinking a proposal was coming so I was immediately suspicious. Then he proceeded to tell me that the teddy bear was "defective" (it was supposed to do something when battery powered)! Huh! That's just a strange thing to say! Why on earth would you buy a "defective" bear I wondered!

As soon as he left that day, I immediately went straight to that bear and started to investigate! I went searching for the battery compartment. What I found, with my younger brother right by my side, confirmed my suspicions!! The battery compartment had a piece of masking tape across it and said, "Don't throw out"! Huh!!!!! Something certainly was suspicious!

Of course I proceeded to open it and found a beautiful diamond ring inside! My brother was right beside me the whole time, curious what was going on.....but no Jon right by my side!!!! My mom proceeded to take a picture of me with the ring.

Then I called Jon's place (he lived about 20 minutes away at this point) but he wasn't yet home and I told his roommate "I think Jon just proposed to me!" In other words, Jon was engaged without even knowing it!!!!!


Needless to say we got together that evening and he proposed officially on bended knee...and of course I said "yes":-)

JUNE 1'st 1996


We have shared many happy years together since that time. He is truly my soul mate and my best friend. I thank God for His hand of protection and blessing in our lives. With our young and impulsive natures we could easily have met and married the wrong person I'm sure! But God saved us for each other and put us in each other's paths at precisely the right time...and in the same neighbourhood as well! Little did I know how perfect our match was. Though we both are very different from each other, we really compliment each other and connect on the most important and crucial matters. I'm so thankful for Jon.

The three most beautiful and precious people in my life, thirteen years later.... God certainly is the Giver of good and perfect gifts!


We have lots of fun together, laugh, share, cry, talk, dream...and just love each other. He is an amazing father and husband and most importantly man after God's own heart.

So, on this day, we celebrate 13 years of marriage!

Friends On Board

I'm excited because a couple friends from church are interested in joining me for the journey through Thin Within this time round! Woohoo! I haven't had any in-person TW journey companions as of yet, so this is a big encouragement for me! Praise God!

Dear Women...

And yes, I am directing that to every single woman...

My heart aches for those who struggle with this day. For those who long to be mothers but have never been able to have children for various reasons. For those whose mothers have passed away and really miss them on this day. For those who never had a mother who cared. For those whose children do not honor them.

So, here is what I feel God laying on my heart to say...

I think it is fair to say that stereotypically, and usually in reality, women can be characterized as "nurturers." As women most of us generally "feel" things in a way that is unique to our gender. And many of our "feelings" move us to care for others in unique and beautiful loving, often "nuturing," ways.

So, which women have nurtured and cared for you throughout your lifetime?

Who have your poured your life into?

Who have you cared for?

Many of us have had the privilege of being biological (or even adoptive) mothers, bearing children and caring for them and raising them. What a beautiful (and santifying!) experience this can be.

All of us have had our own biological or adoptive mother. For some this may bring up painful memories. For others sweet thoughts.

And I'd like to push this one step further. As christian women (and men of course) we have all been given the command to love others and to share Jesus with the world. Each time we plant seeds into tender hearts we are nurturing and caring as a spiritual mother. Some people we may only have the privilege of planting a seed or two. Sometimes we are called to water the growing seed. Sometimes we have the amazing privilege of harvesting the seed of the gospel in people's lives, leading them to surrender their lives to the Lord and discipling them. For some we may truly empty ourselves out for the sake of.

I think it is fair to say many many Christian women, though they have no biological children, are spiritual mothers.

My heart spills over with joy and gratitude for each of you who pours out your life for others. Thank you for giving. Thank you for breathing life into other's lives. Thank you for caring and nurturing those around you. Thank you for planting, watering and harvesting the spiritual seed in others lives! Thank you for being YOU!

Taking the well known Proverbs 31 passage, which presents such a challenging example of a wife and mother, let me share this reminder to my sisters in Christ...

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." Proverbs 31:30

Let us continue serving the Lord, nurturing tender hearts...

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6:9

I am blown away by the blessing God has bestowed on us to be able to be His instrument, to be used for His glory!

Challenge #9 ~ The First Meal of the Rest of Your Life

I think this exercise (as outlined on pg 154-155 of Thin Within) provides a great opportunity to put the eight keys of conscious eating into practice. My challenge this week will be to apply this exercise. Anyone else care to join this week's challenge? Keep me posted if you do!

First of all before you even start, try to set up the right environment (maybe china, music, flowers, special lighting, a favorite spot etc.), making sure it is a calm environment and reducing distractions. The book recommends that "it is best to eat this meal with the Lord as you only companion, although you may have someone with you if that person toally supports your desire to be conscious of your food and the Lord." Remember, "the main purpose of this experience is to taste and see that Lord is good."

Last June I typed up a summary of this exercise along with some quick point reminders.

1.) PRAY
"Ask God to help you honor the body He has given you by maintaining the appropriate boundaries, including time and place. Reaffirm your love for Him and your desire to enjoy the food He has provided."

2.) COMFY
"Select your favorite spot and wear clothes in which you are comfortable."

3.) #0
"Check your hunger level. Plan to be at a 0 so that you can truly enjoy the food."

4.) ENTER GOD'S PRESENCE
"Take a moment to enter into God's presence as you invite Him to be a part of your dining experience."

5.) NOTE ENVIRONMENT
"Notice everything about the environment. No matter how familiar it may be, look at it as if you have never seen it before. Thank the Lrod for all of His provisions."

6.) NOTE FOOD
"Before you start eating, become aware of every item of food. Notice how it looks on the plate. Express your gratitude for the beauty in teh colors of the food and its fragrance. Before taking your first bite, take a moment to thank God for His generous provisions, and pray that the food would bring physical satisfactiona nd health to your body."

7.) SAVOUR
"Chew the food slowly and notice the different flavours and textures."

8.) SAMPLE
"Sample each item and then ask yourself it it was enjoyable. Does it really delight you? Or did you just think it would?"

9.) RATE
"How would you rate each item on your plate from 0 to 10 (0 being awful and 10 being terrific)?"

10.) #5
"Before you continue eating, check in with your hunger #'s. Stop eating when you're at a comfortable 5. Remember, your empty stomach is only as large as your fist."

11.) THANK GOD
"When you've finished, once again thank and praise God, for this time and for what you have learned during the dining experience."

Unique Approach to Chewing Food!

Eating 0-5 can be a real challenge. I can be particularily difficult to always follow each of the keys to conscious eating, aiming to make it essentially the "first meal of the rest of your life" each and every time!

Here's a quick recap of the keys to conscious eating:

• 1. Eat when my body is hungry ("0").
• 2. Eat in a calm environment by reducing distractions.
• 3. Eat when sitting.
• 4. Eat when my body and mind are relaxed.
• 5. Eat and drink the things my body enjoys.
• 6. Pay attention to my food while eating.
• 7. Eat slowly, savoring each bite.
• 8. Stop before my body is full ("5").

The other day at the Thin Within forums an old thread re-surfaced: Any tips on eating slowly?

There was some really useful and interesting stuff posted there. But the post that really grabbed my attention was posted by Lizzy Joy here. She talked about how she finds it helpful to chew to memory verses or to music! I thought that was very unique!

So, I have given it a try this week a few times. The first time I tried chewing in time to memory verses (saying them in my head). That was tough since I say it kind of fast in my head, so I'd end up chewing too fast I found. Of course if I said the verses in my head very meditatively and slowly, reflecting on each word, the pace for chewing may be a little more manageable!

Then I tried chewing to my prayers, basically constant gratitude to the Lord for every bite and for His provisions, chewing in time to each word. That was very beneficial I found.

I also tried chewing to music... I don't think I found the right song yet for that to really work!

In each of the attempts I have found my attention drawn more fully to the Lord and gratitude for His provisions. This is a wonderful thing! I have found eating a much more meditative process.

So, I just thought I'd share these little tidbits with you as I thought they were quite a unique way of approaching chewing food:-) Therefore, even while (or especially while!) eating I cry to the Lord...

Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long. Your commands make me wiser than my enemies, for they are ever with me. Psalm 119:97-98

Transformed blogspot

I've been thinking a bit more about how I want to pursue accountability... I was ready to put my last food & exercise log to rest and start with a clean fresh slate.

As a result I created a new blog called "Transformed." You can read about the purpose of the blog here. I'm thinking it would be pretty neat to have a "group" or "team" blog, with multiple contributors, if anyone is interested.

In the meantime I'm going to jump right in and start posting there:-) Boy I'm going to have everyone confused with all my blogspots!

Here is the rundown of my blogs and their various focuses:

Rainbow Promises (that's here of course!) - I aim to have a pretty general focus on all aspects of my spiritual walk, though often my tendency is to dwell on surrendering food/eating to the Lord. I'll continue posting here as the Lord leads.

I am thankful for... - This blog is all about counting my blessings and praising God with a grateful heart!

Transformed - I'm envisioning the aim of this being focussed primarily on eating/exercise (though that may change depending on who is interested in joining me). I have listed a series of questions to reflect on each day.

Okay, enough from me for today!

Soaring with Praise!

My heart is soaring with praise for so many answers to prayer this past weekend. I would have posted them here...but they really do fit more appropriately on my counting my blessings blog! So you can view what I'm thankful for over the past weekend HERE.

I have to add one more thing that I just thought of... I'm thankful for much needed encouragement that I received from two individuals who emailed me regarding my blog ON THE SAME DAY! It was like God knew my heart needed that pick-me-up from these two sisters in Christ :-) So, thank you Susanna and Monique for your kind words of encouragement. God used your words to minister to me...and also sharpen me. Thank you.

This is the Day!

(Jon took this sunrise picture last summer, our last morning in Mexico)

This morning started off so beautifully...for a change. My blood pressure wasn't rising. My youngest daughter was happily getting dressed (which is HUGE for her!), ate her breakfast and got her morning routine completed HAPPILY! We had lots and lots of snuggles and laughs together. And she was ready BEFORE her big sister (a miracle I tell you!) and was singing every step of the way!

PRAISE GOD!

Walking step by step through my morning so far...

This morning the Lord woke me up at 5am. I couldn't fall back to sleep and finally at 5:30am I decided it was indeed the Lord waking me and I silently tiptoed off to the livingroom and cracked open my bible. I had a wonderful time of reading and prayer and also managed to memorize another verse (one of my goals). What a great start to the day, feasting at the Lord's Table!

Next I had an early breakfast as I was feeling hungry, though my tummy didn't give me the normal and usual rumble. I figured I'd fuel up for the day at this point. Then I snuggled with our guinea pigs for a bit. (btw we found new homes for the two baby guinea pigs...praise God! Seriously, that was a prayer of mine lately as it was looking like it was going to be tough to find new homes for them.)

Then I got out my jump rope and got to exercise while watching "The Mom Show," a Canadian talk show whose title is self-explanatory.

Then I got those little guinea pigs and brought them into my youngest daughter's room so they could wake her up with a "good morning" snuggle. This set her off into a great mood right off the bat! Praise God!

After that I started singing a few songs, one of them being "This is the day." Well that really was a hit. I don't think she's ever heard that song before! It was one of the classics I grew up on. And then we moved into all the usual morning chores and routines. And finally, in the last five minutes before they needed to get ready, we snuggled together.

The best part of it all was when it was time to head out the door. I challenged her to get dressed in her snow gear in the time it took me to sing "This is the day!" Well, that got her going! She was ready SO HAPPILY in no time at all! And then she proceeded to start singing it over and over again as my oldest daughter got dressed:-)

Wow, praise God for a new day! Praise God for THIS day! He is good!

This is the day the LORD has made;
let us rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24

Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.
Psalm 100:4-5

He Has Made Me Glad

The Lord's Table~Day 55 through 60

Day 55~All Food is Acceptable

I think the title of this lesson is self-explanatory!

"Are you so dull?" he asked. "Don't you see that nothing that enters a man from the outside can make him 'unclean'? For it doesn't go into his heart but into his stomach, and then out of his body." (In saying this, Jesus declared all foods "clean.") He went on: "What comes out of a man is what makes him 'unclean.' For from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly. All these evils come from inside and make a man 'unclean.' " Mark 7:18-23

The Spirit clearly says that in later times some will abandon the faith and follow deceiving spirits and things taught by demons. Such teachings come through hypocritical liars, whose consciences have been seared as with a hot iron. They forbid people to marry and order them to abstain from certain foods, which God created to be received with thanksgiving by those who believe and who know the truth. For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, because it is consecrated by the word of God and prayer. 1 Timothy 4:1-5

Let us be people who eat whatever we want with rejoicing and thanksgiving, worshipping God in our hearts, remembering to be moderate in the amount that we eat. This is what honors the Lord and provides spiritual and physical health. TLT workbook pg180


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Day 56~How to Lose Weight...Worship

Though we will never hear this from the world, becoming free from overeating is a matter of learning how to enjoy the Lord. Freedom comes from learning how to drink Him in, how to quench our thirst in Him, how to feast our souls on Him. It is impossible to enjoy sin and enjoy teh Lrod at the same time, and those who are learning to nourish their souls and quench their thirst in Jesus are done with overeating. TLT workbook pg182

Joe writes: "The result of pursing food was weight gain, the result of pursing God is gaining a relationship with Him and learning to rely on Him." TLT workbook pg182

The four principles unpacked in this lesson are:

1. Focus: fix my eyes on Christ
2. Bow: surrender and submit to His Lordship
3. Offer: give myself to Him as a living sacrifice.
4. Enjoy: take pleasure in God and His Word.

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Day 57~Losing Weight By Delighting in the Lord

Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

God will give us the desires of our heart because He will be the desire of our hearts. TLT workbook pg184

The whole key is to find ways in which our hearts rejoice in the Lord, and then explore new methods of making ourselves happy in Him. TLT workbook pg185

I desire to dwell on God's word and grow deep roots to feed upon His Word, just like I wrote about in my last post. I will delight in the Lord and find my Greatest Treasure as I return to God and turn away from sin.

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Day 58~Praise Brings Victory

An interesting story from 2 Chronicles was unpacked in this lesson. The Israelites were in battle. Jehoshaphat was the leader of God's people. And as he sought the Lord for help in the battle this is what is written...

This is what the LORD says to you: 'Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God's. 2 Chronicles 20:15

After consulting the people, Jehoshaphat appointed men to sing to the LORD and to praise him for the splendor of his holiness as they went out at the head of the army, saying: "Give thanks to the LORD, for his love endures forever." 2 Chronicles 20:21

Did you notice the singers were teh ones who led the way?! I thought that was such a cool observation that was noted in the TLT study.

Focussing on God, His strength and power, His purposes, His sovereignty...rather then myself...reflects SURRENDER to Him! It also reflects trust and dependance on Him.

Here are some ideas on how to put this into practice (a brief summary of what was noted on pg 189 of the workbook)

• Create and seek to get away to a secret place of devotion with the Lord....make your heart glad in Him.
• Using a hymnal or praise song book read the words and sing the songs.
• Learn to use every temptation from the evil one as a stimulus to turn your heart toward praising God.
• Let it become an automatic response, over time, that when you receive bad news, you instantly worship the Lord.
• Learn to know when you fail the most, and prepare in advance to praise the Lrod instead of gratifying your flesh...preplan your victory... So we must learn to recognize the usual times when we fail, and replace them with pre-scheduled praising of the Lord.
• Count your blessings.
• Listen to music that lifts your heart in praise to God.

I loved all of the above ideas. I personally would like to carve out more times to play the piano and sing in worship to the Lord. It fills the sails of my heart as I praise the Lord:-)

Later in this lesson it was noted how prayer and praise preceded victory and freedom for Paul and Silas when they were supernaturally released from prison.

Here's a worthy goal that Mona writes about on pg 190: "Instead of eating out of habit, I will replace that with praising Him out of habit."

Day 59 & 60 were review days.... I'll write a bit about that in the next post.

Venting

There's not too much reason I'm writing right now except to vent :-)

Let me start off by saying that it is a crazy -50 celcius (-58 farenheit) with windchill taken into account this morning! This is one of those crazy cold canadian days that we get the reputation for!

We woke up an hour earlier then usual by Jon's work phoning to say school was out (but he still had to come in~he's a high school teacher by the way). Next, I offered to do a carpool swap with my friend to get our kids to and from school. I offered to drive the kids all to school this morning. But I went out to start the van and it wouldn't start. I guess it didn't help that it was sitting in the cold, not going anywhere, for the past two days. So I had to call back and ask my friend if she would mind doing the driving at the last minute, which she graciously did. And now I discover that Jon must have taken my set of keys to school, so there is no chance I can get that grocery shopping in that I had planned...if the van would start a little later which was my aim to try!

So, I'm stuck indoors I guess... Not so bad. Ironically I was up at 7am this morning getting supper in the slowcooker so I wouldn't have to fuss with that (as I had a number of errands and jobs I was planning on getting done today). So, supper is already on the go. I may get to baking some bread later. I have been thinking about getting back to making my own homemade bread instead of using storebought bread. I have a bunch of recipes I want to try out. I'll prep a little for teaching piano lessons this evening. And I'll get some prep also done for the ladies bible study that I'm facilitating and that is starting up tomorrow.

Of course I do need to venture outdoors for lunch supervision today...so I'm not indoors for the entire day:-)

"This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24

I'm extremely thankful for a warm house on days like this. We are very very blessed to have a warm house, warm clothing and transportation. I'm thankful for Jon's job which provides us with a good income. I'm thankful for friends who I can call up for favors like carpooling the kids! I'm thankful for the time to sit at my Lord's feet today. Hmmm....I'm beginning to wonder if I need to connect the dots here! Today would be a perfect day to sit at Jesus' feet:-)

Thanks Lord for all of these blessings! I'm thankful for this day, no matter how my plans have all gone upside down! I will be glad for this day and all that YOU have planned for it. I pray that I will glorify You in all I say and do and think! Amen.

Well, that's it for my "venting"/"sharing"! And one last thing, while I'm on the theme of "sharing"...here's a cute picture I ran across and brought a smile to my face:-)

The Big Surprise!

We had a big surprise this morning. We're all having a big laugh about it:-) You can read about it here at my counting my blessings blog.

Learning Past Lessons

Over the past few days I have felt nudged to apply some of the past lessons learned.

1. "Thin Within" Keys to Conscious Eating.

The keys to conscious eating are a wonderful tool. I want to apply them more consistently once again. I am thankful for the provisions of the Lord. He certainly is a giver of good gifts (James 1:17; Matthew 7:11)

Here is a recap of the keys to conscious eating:

Keys to Conscious Eating
1. Eat when my body is hungry ("0").
2. Eat in a calm environment by reducing distractions.
3. Eat when sitting.
4. Eat when my body and mind are relaxed.
5. Eat and drink the things my body enjoys.
6. Pay attention to my food while eating.
7. Eat slowly, savoring each bite.
8. Stop before my body is full ("5").

I think each and every one of those points need some work.

2. Observe and Correct

The tool of observation and correction is particularily heavy on my mind and heart. I have moved far away from this intentional approach towards eating. Here's a quote I appreciated in my TW readings today...

Enjoy the privilege today of applying God's grace in the present moment. You don't need to wallow in any meausre of self-contempt. Observe what hasn't worked, agree with God, correct your behavior in the strength He gives you. Then move on down the path of God's provision as you experience the abundant life. TW pg 43

Too often I eat outside the 0-5 boundaries and don't even take the time to reflect on what went wrong and what I could do differently next time. Actually as I type this it reminds me that this is true in many areas of my life, not just eating.

I don't focus on confession enough.

I just think "I blew it" and often wallow in feelings of failure. Yet each of these "failures" in my life are teaching moments. I need to seek God, allow His light to shine on secret places of my heart (Psalm 90:8), confessing sin and accept His grace, forgiveness and empowering. Some of my favorite quotes that I have highlighted in the past are:

I am a learner not a failure.

Never consider a single defeat a final defeat. F. Scott Fitzgerald

I'm not a failure, but a work in progress. Sheila (TW pg95)

God is doing a good work in me and will bring it to completion in Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:6) I am being transformed into His likeness (2 Corinthians 3:18).

3. Pre-plan for trials

I also feel convicted of the need to pre-plan for trials, to be more intentional with each and every choice I make (not just with eating, but also in every other area of my life). I have strayed far from this once again.

I am reminded to be self-controlled and alert for the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour (1 Peter 5:8).

Oftentimes I approach eating without much forethought...and then I fall into some sticky situations where I struggle to make the right choices. By doing some pre-planning I know that I can set myself up for better choices. I am more likely to see the way out of temptation that God has provided if I have a more "intentional" mindset (1 Corinthians 10:13).

4. Feast at the Lord's table

Most importantly I am continuing to feast at the Lord's table. He prepares a table before me (Psalm 23:5). I NEED to fill up on Him, get fat on Jesus:-)

5. Gratitude

I long for my attitude to be saturated with praise and thankfulness and gratitude to the Lord in each and every circumstance (1 Thessalonians 5:18). I am using my counting my blessings blog to record things I'm thankful for. And the awesome thing about gratitude is that as I focus on gratitude the focus begins to shift away from self and onto God and onto others! It's not all about me ;-)


So, there you have it, these are some goals I'm re-committing to. Sadly I have learned and applied each and every one of these points months ago but then many of them got put in the corner and ignored for the most part. Time to wake up and enjoy the abundant life that God has prepared for those those who follow Him!

Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:14

The Lord's Table~Day 24, 25, 26

Day 24~Vigilance

"Keep watching and praying that you may not enter into temptation; the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." Matthew 26:41

Watch and pray. Watch and pray. Watch and pray.

How many times do I need to say that to get that through my head????!!!

The following question is asked: What are some specific areas of temptation that you need to be watchful and pray about?

That question sure sounds a lot like the Thin Within term "fat or flesh machinery" (what causes me to turn to food when I'm not hungry).

My usual (!) answers: tiredness, social occasions, evening munchies, taste testing etc...

Here's a great verse to add to the "watch and pray" advisory that Jesus gives...

Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings. 1 Peter 5:8-9

The magnetic pull of food is a reflection of the power of Satan's lies and what lines the walls of my mind. Yet how encouraging it is to know that he CANNOT make me do anything. As the Beth Moore "Breaking Free" study highlights...

"Satan does not have the power or authority to lock believers in a prison of oppression. He works overtime to talk us into staying because he lacks the power to keep us there. Satan can presume no authority over Christians. He only has authority by invitation. He woos us into prison cells, but he cannot make us enter nor force us to stay. Unfortunately, Satan doesn't require a written invitation. Failure to post a "keep away" sign through Bible study and prayer can be invitation by default. Do not misunderstand me to say that Satan can inhabit the mind of a believer. Most definitely he cannot. The Word suggests, however, that he can strongly encourage ideas, doubts and thoughts into our minds.... Why does Satan have to use lies? Because he is a totally defeated foe... Lies are all Satan has. That's why he has to be so adept at using them." Breaking Free workbook by Beth Moore pg 192, 193

I'm sensing a theme here! Be vigilant (watch and pray) about what lines the walls of my mind. This is my "keep away" sign!

Application:
Some things that I can do to "drag every known sin, and temptation into the light" and be vigilant are...

• truth journalling, noting what is lining the walls of my mind and applying the truth of Scripture to each and every thought and taking it captive for Christ
  

• continued bible reading/prayer (especially early morning)~be saturated
  

• memorization (I still haven't applied this, but really want to)

• pre-plan for trials

• focus on conscious eating

Can you tell I'm a list-maker??? I'm the person who actually makes a rough copy and GOOD copy of my shopping lists!!!! I know I'm crazy! It's just the way I function best:-)


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Day 25~The Greatness of God

This lesson focuses on, of course, the greatness of God:-)

"Those who do not see the greatness of God become great in their own eyes." TLT workbook pg 81

I LOVE Isaiah 40. It is a wonderful description of God. Here are a few things I higlighted about Who God is as I read through this chapter...

• Shepherd (cares, leads, tends, nurtures)

• Creator

• All-knowing

• All-wise

• Big

• Great

• Nothing/No one can compare

• King (enthroned above all)

• Above all in authority

• No equal

• He lifts us up

• He gives us strength and hope

I am left wondering if I have a false view of God when I am being gluttonous. Two lies that came to mind were:
God doesn't care about just this one time.
Calling out to God in the midst of temptation doesn't work. He doesn't answer.

Both of those are lies which I will tackle in my next post.


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Day 26~Break the Chain

What an awesome lesson this was. It's amazing how God ties a whole bunch of teaching together to speak to me.

Day 14 of Thin Within is entitled "Choosing to Build on Truth." It emphasizes how beliefs lead to action which lead to results. Are my beliefs grounded in the Truth of God's Word?

Sounds a bit like what God has been unpacking for me in the Breaking Free study, doesn't it?! The walls of our minds are never bare. So, what lines the walls of my mind? Satan's lies or God's truth? I must examine what lines the walls of my mind (recognize the captor), stand in agreement with God, tear down the lies, put of the truth of God's Word, and thought must bow to the Truth.

And this sounds quite similar to what I've read about the concept of "truth journalling." I know Heidi has mentioned it a number of times in her blog. What I gather is that I am to write out my thoughts/feelings, discern whether it is a lie or a truth and then apply the truth of Scripture to each statement.

Today's TLT lesson is right in line with all these teachings.

You and I have had a problem with overeating. And if we examine times of failure we will always find a chain of events that lead up to the "crash." TLT workbook pg 83

Here's a destructive chain that was described in Genesis 13:8-13 and the points that Mike Cleveland notes...

1. Separate from fellowship
2. See something sinful and focus on it
3. Set out toward it
4. Pitch our tent near it and live in it
5. Taken captive by it

I am learning to notice when links in an accident chain are developing and to break at least one link to prevent an overeating accident. TLT workbook pg 84

I can relate this to the TW chapter 14 exercise...
Break the chain under the canopy of God's grace by lining up my beliefs with the truth of God's Word which leads to actions (obedience) which leads to results (holy living).

Relating this same teaching from TLT to the Breaking Free emphasis on asking the question of what lines the walls of our minds...
Break the chain by tearing down lies and replacing them with the truth of God's Word.

I can also relate this same teaching to the the concept of "truth journalling" by Barb Raveling.
Beliefs lead to feelings which lead to actions.
My understanding is the premise is to line up beliefs with truth.


Hmmm.... Do you sense a theme here??? God is definitely speaking pretty loud and clear it seems:-)

Onto my "assignment" from God! Tearing down the lies of Satan (breaking a link in the chain) and replace with the Truth of God's Word! This may take some time. I got a bit of a head start today (and will post that tomorrow!) but I can see it's going to be a lot of work! But I trust it will be well worth the effort!

Lord, please help me as I search Your Word for truth. Please guide me to Scripture that speaks to each and every one of Satan's lies that I have allowed to line the walls of my mind. Give me discernment and understanding. Help me see how GREAT You are! I pray that I would begin to have the mind of Christ and experience the freedom that You desire for each of Your children. In Jesus name, amen.

The Lord's Table~Day 18,19,20,21

Day 18~Setting Captives Free I

Slaves are not free people, but rather they have a master and must do his bidding. I remember how a food image would lodge in my brain, and I could try to pray it away, ignore it, or read the Bible, but it kept after me until I would eventually give in and obey the demands to indulge. Then I would feel bad and ask for God's forgiveness, but soon after I would be indulging again over a different food thought, over and over. This is slavery to sin. Have you had this type of "slavery" experience? TLT workbook pg 57

YES! YES! YES! I can completely relate to this description.

This lesson highlights the following verses...

To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." They answered him, "We are Abraham's descendants and have never been slaves of anyone. How can you say that we shall be set free?" Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed." John 8:31-36

It is the TRUTH, Jesus Christ, Who sets us free!

So this lesson asks the question: What are some lies you have believed in your overeating?

Lies...

• If I don't eat it now it will continue tempting me.

• Eating MORE of something will somehow be MORE satisfying.

• I'm tired and eating will bring enjoyment and relaxation.

Truth...

• Eating it NOW does temporarily remove the temptation... But too often another temptation is lying in wait! It doesn't solve the dilemma!
• Eating MORE of something definitely is NOT more satisfying. Rather it brings me a sore belly and feelings of shame and condemnation.
• Eating when I'm tired DOES bring me a degree of enjoyment and relaxation. But ultimately it also brings with it the baggage of guilt and condemnation as I know it is not the best choice at this time. God has many more provisions that I can enjoy and be refreshed by in those moments. Food is not the wisest choice.
  

I really appreciated this scripture as well...

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile." Jeremiah 29:12-14

I need to keep calling on God, seeking Him, praying to Him WITH ALL MY HEART. He WILL answer. He WILL reveal truth. He WILL restore me.


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Day 19~Setting Captives Free II--From Prison to Praise

Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble,
and he saved them from their distress.
He brought them out of darkness and the deepest gloom
and broke away their chains.
Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love
and his wonderful deeds for men,
for he breaks down gates of bronze
and cuts through bars of iron. Psalm 107:13-16

The above passage shows that God responds to His people crying out to Him by:

• humbling their hearts
  

• saving them

• bringing them out of darkness
  

• breaking their chains

• breaking down gates of bronze and cutting bars of iron

I'm so weak. I get so mad at myself. It seems I start the day with such resolve (and prayer may I add) but then somehow this resolve just keeps weakening as the day goes by, especially the instant I'm hungry, the instant sugar is in front of me, the instant a thought/lust for eating enters my mind.

I keep calling and calling out to the Lord. I know lessons are being learned through this. It is not for nothing. I'm enslaved to my sinful lusts. I'm still trying to be the lord of my life in this area. I'm still doing things MY way. I'm in a prison right now. I need God to set me free. I need a true humble, contrite, repentant heart. I need to take each thought captive for Christ.

He WILL humble and save me. He WILL bring me out of this darkness. He WILL break the bands apart. He WILL shatter the gates of bronze and cut the bars of iron. I trust God CAN and WILL do this.


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Day 20~Setting Captives Free III

"Now you shall eat in this manner: with your loins girded, your sandals on your feet, and your staff in your hand; and you shall eat it in haste--it is the LORD'S Passover." Exodus 12:11

This verse highlights how the Israelites were to be ready for flight, ready to escape slavery. They were to be ready to move AWAY from Egypt.

So how do I "eat my way out of slavery?" Answer: Feed on the Word of God! The way that you and I today, "eat the Lamb," is to take Scripture and chew on it, and apply it to our lives... Freedom follows fullness... We can't "try" our hardest not to overeat and be successful; we will always fail. But we can "eat" our way out of slavery. TLT workbook pg65

But his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on his law he meditates day and night.
He is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither.
Whatever he does prospers. Psalm 1:2-3

What an awesome verse! I need to be hooked up to the true water source. Then I will yield fruit and prosper. This is all about walking with God moment by moment, capturing each and every thought for Christ, and saying "Get away satan, for it is written..."

God impressed the following thoughts on my heart this day...

Why do I leave this time, first thing in the morning, as the main time I feed on His word...yet I physically eat a breakfast, lunch and a supper and sometimes even a snack in between. I feel challenged to have a spiritual breakfast, lunch and supper, filling up on His word throughout the day to keep me going. Maybe my spiritual supper should be one of my biggest meals, just as it is physically for me. For the evening is the time I feel most tempted.

I've been trying to follow through with this the past two days and it has been wonderfully satisfying to fill up on God's word more frequently.

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Day 21~Focus

This lesson is all about fixing my eyes on Jesus. If I focus on the pull of the sin then I'm pulled under. I need focus on Christ. He will help me rise above.

Application for me would be...

• capturing each thought for Christ (surrendering each and every thought to Him)

• spiritual breakfast, lunch and supper

• constant prayer, spending time with God moment by moment

Over the past few days I have felt a little dragged down as I studied the TLT materials. It emphasizes the seriousness of sin and the need for repentance. TW, in contrast, emphasizes the grace of God in the face of our failures and sins and the need to observe and correct rather then beat ourselves up with the club of condemnation. I find TW is quite motivating in its approach. Yet I also know I have needed this TLT material to highlight the ugliness of my sin and to highlight my need for further surrender and turning to the Lord. So I continue to pray for a truly repentant heart. And I need to remember to focus on the TW tool of observation and correction as this has really helped me in the past. I've been completely bypassing that tool lately!

Thin Within~Day 29, 30

I have to admit I'm ending this book at a time that feels far from being a celebration of a changed heart. Instead I have come to the end of this book and been shocked at how wayward my heart can be! It is a good reminder that I must always be vigilant, watchful and prayerful. I don't anticipate this particular struggle will ever be completely gone. I anticipate it is an area that will need to be continually offered up to the Lord in surrender.

That being said, one thing that is very evident, is I can see how many changes HAVE actually taken place in my heart and life since these last weeks have been so *different* then the past 6 months! Does that make any sense? I can see that to be far from conscious eating and even caring about hunger/fullness eating is very different from how I've been living my life since February 2008. I know that is looking at the half full portion of the glass rather then the half empty portion!! Anyways, I do thank God for continuing to convict me and for His faithfulness. I know He is continuing to do a good work in me and will bring it to completion... I feel a great sense of hope and anticipation. I also am overwhelmed by His love, graciousness, mercy, patience, faithfulness and steadfastness.

I started on "The Lord's Table" workbook today. I'm very excited to learn more about "feasting" at the Lord's table! That truly excites me!

ThinWithin~Day 21, 22, 23

I appreciated the emphasis in chapter 21 on the importance of gratitude.

"As we practice gratitude, we find outselves not so focused on ourselves. As we turn our eyes toward God we experience the lifting up of our own eyes." TW pg 227

I want gratitude and joy in the Lord and rejoicing to become the very fabric of my character. I continue to count my blessings :-)

I found the following quote quite thought-provoking...

"We mean an entire surrender of the whole being to God; spirit, soul and body placed under His absolute control, for Him to do with us just what He pleases. We mean that the language of our soul, under all circumstances, and in view of every act, is to be, 'They will be done.' We mean the giving up of all liberty of choice. We mean a life of inevitable obedience. To a soul ignorant of God, this may look hard. But to those who know Him, it is the happiest and most restful of lives. He is our Father, and He loves us, and He knows just what is best, and therefore, of course, His will is the very most blessed thing that can come to us under all circumstances."
Hannah Whittal Smith quoted in TW pg 228

Then more lessons kept popping out at me as I was doing the "Breaking Free" study by Beth Moore. The following statement REALLY resonates:

"If God simply waved a wand over us and broke every yoke without our cooperation do you know what would probably happen? We would soon pick up another. God desires to change us from the inside out--renewing our minds, starving our self-destructive tendencies, and teaching us to form new habits. These results come only to those who learn to walk all over again, this time with their Deliverer."
Beth Moore in "Breaking Free" workbook pg 138

How true!!! I'd say this is what my thin within journey has been all about... God wants to set me free from the bondage of gluttony and greed (and also from an undisciplined loose tongue and laziness and out-of-control emotions). He doesn't want me to pick up another yoke. He really and truly wants to be my Deliverer and set me FREE...by renewing our minds, starving our self-destructive tendencies, and teaching us to form new habits!

The phrase that especially spoke to me was "renewing our minds." A big part of this to me means making sure my beliefs line up with God's truth. This is something that has been hitting me left right and center over the past couple months!

That pertains to just about any beliefs...

• moral ones....what does God's word have to say about this issue?
• self...does what I believe about myself line up with what God thinks about me.
• how I handle situations...line this up with God's word.
• thought life...take thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ.
• beliefs that affect my actions...make sure they line up with God's truth.
• etc....

I have found this incredibly liberating and very encouraging. God's Word is a tool in the face of all of Satan's attacks. And it has certainly encouraged me to use Scripture more frequently and more effectively.

That being said, I long to soak up God's word and keep growing deeper roots. I long to be thirsty and hungry for Him alone. I long to find that satisfaction that only He can offer because He's the only one who really and truly knows what is best for me:-)

My prayers were echoed in the TW chapters I was reading the past few days...

"I want to give myself totally to You as an offering. I pray that You will find my offering pleasing and holy, Lord. I worship You today with my choices. This will include when I start and when I stop eating. Please renew my mind so that I, Christina, can know Your good, pleasing and perfect will." TW pg237

"I pray that I will have a greater desire not only to read Your Word but allow it to be written on the tablet of my heart. As I meditate on Scripture, cause it to satisfy my soul..." TW pg 240

Thin Within~Day 17

Today's chapter emphasized the need for gratitude. I love this quote:

As we continue to be thankful to the Lord, we discover that the shackles of self-preoccupation and greed begin to fall away, that our incessant need or want for more food begins to diminish. TW pg 174-175

I want this to become a more natural habit, for gratitude to be foremost in my heart and mind at all times. My Counting my Blessings blog is intended for this very purpose. I want to post there more regularily, even about things that are seemingly mundane and ordinary.

I'm thankful for today. I'm thankful for a thought-provoking sermon in church this morning. I'm thankful for family. I'm thankful for our new pet. I'm thankful for beautiful weather. I'm thankful for an awesome husband. And I'm thankful for a great time of learning at the church this evening, as we learned about the joy of being a helpmate to our husband. I'm thankful for good nutritious food. I'm thankful for good health. I'm thankful for the beautiful smiles of my children. I'm thankful that my youngest daughter got dressed on HER OWN this morning without any battles!!! I'm thankful for God's grace. I'm thankful that God has lifted me out of that slimy pit, the muck and the mire. I'm thankful for His faithfulness. I'm thankful for His righteousness and holiness. I'm thankful for His love.

Okay, I wasn't even planning going there...but it just seemed fitting:-)

Today went well in regards to eating. I am thankful that God provided me with the strength I needed to stay within the boundaries of hunger and fullness and also helped me make some good discerning choices in regards to food. I still had a bit more sugar then I would want on a regular basis...but it wasn't out of control and I didn't feel mastered by it. For this I'm thankful to God.

Eating today:

0-5 at 8:30am

0-5 at 11:30am (I had some lunchtime dessert about an hour after I ate my main course)

0-5 at 5:00pm

It's fabulous Friday!

Okay, I really didn't know what to use for the title of this post :-) I am looking forward to this weekend though. Yesterday was a pretty emotionally exhausting day at work (lunch hour supervision at school). Tonight is our first night for our small group study. I'm really looking forward to all that God will teach us. And then tomorrow is the start of christmas drama practice. I need to get my butt in gear and get the music learned as I am meant to be leading that particular department. I have some learning to do!!!! Saturday I plan on making some pumpkin pie:-) Yummy!!!! Saturday night our piano will be picked up and sold to that fellow from the States who is driving 20 hours to come pick up our "strange" piano:-) And then Sunday I'm making a somewhat "authentic" mexican meal for my parents and brother and family. I'm looking forward to try out some of my new culinary skills for my family:-)

In regards to eating. Wow, the Lord has really been helping me through the last few days. I made it three days eating 0-5...well last night was a *little* off, but I think it still can pretty much count as 0-5. I was not rumbly hungry, but was pretty much at that hungry spot. And my #5 may have been pushing it a *tiny* bit or it may have been my SUPER tight pants that I wore for the entire day! Regardless, I am thankful for God's strength and help through the past few days. Just about everytime I eat I just find myself overflowing with praise to Him. He really is a giver of such good gifts. Thank you Lord.

I guess I better pre-plan a little for any "trials" that may come up this weekend.

#1 Supper at friend's house tonight.
First I'll aim to be hungry for supper. Next, I will aim to just eat one slice of pizza. Then later I'll be having some "death by chocolate" trifle that I'm bringing for our small group meeting.

#2 Drama practice.
If I'm not hungry for breakfast before practice I will bring along a yogurt & granola bar.

#3 Pumpkin pie temptations.
Save it for dessert! Actually I think I'm saving it for Sunday dinner.

#4 Sunday mexican dinner.
Eat slowly, consciously, despite having company. I know I'll be tempted to have more pumpkin pie after company leaves (which really is enjoyable for me after the hard work of putting a meal together). So I think I'll have a small sliver with the meal and then have a regular piece after everything is cleaned up and company gone....and that is only ONE *regular* (not extra large) sized piece!

Well, that's it for me on this fabulous Friday!!! Have a great weekend y'all!

A bit of this and that...

I know my eating hasn't been on track the past number of days...despite my last post about "today" being the day to get back on track. I still feel that something changed inside me the day I made my last post, even though I am "eating my words" as I have certainly not been reflecting a new start with my eating.

I think what clicked for me last Saturday was that I felt like I was once again "ready" to jump in all the way. I'm "ready" to observe and correct once again. I'm "ready" to seek God and His mercy, grace and power once again. I'm "ready"--well, as ready as you can ever be--to surrender this area to God once again. Now I know that my eating (and hence food log) doesn't reflect much of these changes...but I know the inner change will begin to be reflected with outer change as I once again aim to put God first. It's probably pretty evident why I am feeling the "need" to once again post my food log! It's certainly not to brag about being so "good" and "perfect" with 0-5 eating:-)

Okay, onto what God was impressing on me today. I was reading TW chapter 5 and was very encouraged as I read...

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

I definitely feel quite "weak" right now. I know the sin of gluttony has deep roots in my life. Surrendering this area to God is tough! Yet I also know that God's power is proclaimed loud and clear when I surrender to Him and as He works change in this area of my life. That's an exciting thought for me! So I keep pressing on!

I also was encouraged by the mirror, mirror exercise today. I didn't actually follow through with the exercise exactly the way intended... But I did focus on different parts of my body and the ways they have been used by God for different purposes. I am thankful for the body God has given me. I am thankful for energy, stamina, & great health that I've been blessed with thus far. I am thankful for vision and purpose that allows me to use my strengths more effectively for His glory. I'll end with some favorite verse that were quoted at the end of TW chapter 5...

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb; I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:13-16

I'm back!

It feels so good to be back home! What an amazing month it has been. So many answers to prayer and so many blessings were experienced. I've now updated my Counting My Blessings blog along with pictures from the past month.

One thing God taught me throughout our month in Mexico is that there are needs everywhere in the world...even in my own city here in Canada. I went on this trip willing to do whatever, go whereever God wanted me to go...as surrendered as I could be to His will. Did He want our family to move to Mexico? Did He want us to adopt a child? Did He want us to serve the poor and needy here in Canada? What exactly was the purpose behind all this?

I came away from our trip very aware that God had very specifically directed us to this ministry and family in Mexico for a reason. The family who are heading up this ministry were truly needing some extra support and encouragement and we could see that God used us for that purpose...and it was reciprocated as we watched and learned and listened to these passionate christ-followers share from their hearts and live out their lives serving others 24/7.

So, what does the future hold? I really don't know the answer to that. What I do know is that I need to listen to God's direction and follow His leading. So, I'm praying and waiting on God. At this point I have not felt inclined to serve in Mexico full-time...but am certainly continuing to feel directed towards ministry here in my own city amongst those in real need.

As I sought to surrender my future to God....I sadly fell short of surrendering my gluttonous greedy appetite for food to Him. I hate that I still have this root lodged deep down.... I generally was hungry about 1-2x each day (and was eating at least 3x each day). However I went past #5 a lot of meals...knowingly. And I often ate (a lot) when I was not in the least bit hungry.

On the positive note I kept up with my quiet time with the Lord, digging into the Beth Moore bible study. So many "aha" moments as I journey through this book. Most summers are so out-of-whack with schedules, and non-stop family time, that I often don't prioritize my devotions. But this summer was different...and for this I am thankful and praise God. I'm thankful for the hunger He is placing deep within me and for the way He is revealing Himself to me and touching my life.

On another positive note, I stepped on the scale this morning and found my weight had remained the same at 151 pounds! That's amazing! I'm just so thankful I'm not having to start all over again with releasing weight that had already been released! It truly has been released, praise God! My heart soars with praise to God! Now I just have to keep pressing on, make sure I don't stay in the vacation eating mode and continue to move forward to the weight God wants me to reach. More then that I need to keep pressing forward and continue to surrender to God and be set free from this sin of greed and gluttony that popped up its head this past month. I need to get back into consistent 0-5 eating now. I don't want to take a break from this "great project" that God has been doing in my heart and life.