Freedom

As I reflect on the past week, since I decided to throw out the scale, I am amazed at the difference it has already made!
I feel FREE...free not only from the condemnation/shame that comes attached to the number on the scale...but also free to succeed. I'm not sure that makes any sense!

Somehow I'm finding that each moment COUNTS with this approach...in a grace-filled, God focussed kind of way...not out of guilt or shame or anxiety about paying for slip ups when I step on the scale.

I don't feel anxiety. I feel peace.

I don't feel shame. I feel healthy and strong.

I don't feel out of control. I feel myself leaning on the Lord, in constant conversation with God asking for His empowerment and direction.

I have been longing to just meet my body's sustenance needs, not going past satisfaction or overindulging. And strangely enough I think I finally feel free to begin to start cutting back portions a little! What a crazy, twisted perspective, isn't it?! Of course I was always free before, but somehow, if I was to be honest and dig deep, I felt resentful about it. I think I'm ready to come at it from a healthy perspective, not feeling put in a corner.

Lord, thank you for this past week. Help me glorify you with my body. Help me be satisfied and content with simply meeting my body's needs. Thank you for freedom! Amen.

He Loves Me

The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17

He is with me. He is mighty to save.
What a great reminder! This is a truth worth clinging to!

He delights in me.
This is hard for me to fathom. I'm just like a speck of dust in the grand scheme of things, of all the people that have ever lived and ever will live in the future. Yet God DELIGHTS in me. That makes me think that I make Him smile every now and then:-)

He quiets me with His love.
I picture a great big hug, arms wrapped around a child, somehow soothing all the worries and concerns away. It brings the image forth of a mother gently rocking her baby, softly hushing the cries and complaints, singing a soft lullaby in her baby's ear. And before you know it that child or that baby is smiling happily and contentedly up into mommy's face, resting in her embrace. Is that like God and His love for me?

He rejoices over me with singing.
Wow! This one actually feels almost unbelievable to me. First that He rejoices over me. And secondly that He would sing to/for me. It's going to take awhile for me to soak that truth in! It really is amazing to me that He would love me, sinful as I am, in this way.

My husband has been looking at life and faith through the lens of God's immense love for us a lot more then usual lately. He has really been impacted and inspired by another book by Wayne Jacobsen called "He Loves Me." I'm going to have to dig into that book soon because it seems to be affecting every aspect of my husband's outlook lately.

I often think I have no problem seeing life through this lens. Yet, I've been challenged lately. And I have come to realize I can, in no way, even grasp a fraction of the amount of love God has for me...for each and every person.

Are You Amazed?

Reflect

In Living Beyond Yourself, Beth Moore writes,

Gold is not "finished" until it reaches a point of perfect luster. The chief objective of the refiner is to bring the gold to a point of greatest reflection. The gold is not as costly for its own sake as it is for the sake of that which it reflects. It is the light which exposes its qualities. LBD pg 116

She unpacked a few scriptures which God really spoke to my heart through, a few of which I will pinpoint below.

"But if I go to the east, he is not there; if I go to the west, I do not find him. When he is at work in the north, I do not see him; when he turns to the south, I catch no glimpse of him. But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold. My feet have closely followed his steps; I have kept to his way without turning aside. I have not departed from the commands of his lips; I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my daily bread. " Job 23:8-12

"He has tested me and I will come forth as GOLD." Those are Job's words after losing his children, his servants, his livestock, his wealth, his physical health.

"I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my daily bread." Wow! That's powerful! Job certainly glorified God in the trials of life. (On a side note this verse has REALLY spoken to me in regards to weight surrender issues... Treasuring God's word is KEY!)

"And we, who with unveiled faces all REFLECT the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit." 2 Corinthians 3:18

We are called to REFLECT God's glory. And the neat thing is we have "unveiled" faces. Through Jesus' death on the cross the veil has been removed. We can approach the throne of grace with confidence (Hebrews 4:16). That's an amazing truth!

Exodus 34:29-35 describes how Moses had such a radiant face after being in the Lord's presence that he would actually have to put a veil over his face! We are being granted the same privilege! We get to be in God's very presence, with unveiled faces it says in 2 Cor. 3:18. As we spend time fixing our eyes on Him, keeping our mind stayed on Him, simply sitting at His feet and feasting at His table, presenting our prayers and petitions with thanksgiving to Him...we are in the very PRESENCE of God! And we can't help but be TRANSFORMED when we remain in His presence! And we will certainly REFLECT His glory!

As I type this up, I'm being reminded of my favorite childhood verse (I still don't know why this one resonated with me throughout those early years)...

"Those who look to him are RADIANT; their faces are never covered with shame." Psalm 34:5

When I come into His presence I can't help but be purified of sin. I don't think I could come into His presence with a truly rebellious heart. As I come humbly, in prayer, seeking His face and turning from my wicked ways, He hears my prayer, he forgives my sin and heals (2 Chron. 7:14) ...and my face is no longer covered with shame because He has forgiven me!

My main struggles in life are the "mundane" aspects. I simply need sinful impurities to be removed from my heart - my impatience with my kids, my lack of selflessness with my husband, my laziness, my lack of time in prayer, my lack of self-discipline with eating/exercise which happens time and again, my lack of focussing on things from above, my forgetting to be thankful and prayerful, having a loose tongue at times.... I want to STAY in His presence and have these impurities melted away. I want to come forth like gold, REFLECTING His glory!

So, I choose to fix my eyes on Him. I choose to keep my mind stayed on Him. I lay my requests before Him and wait in expectation. I passionately persist...

So that I may REFLECT!

Following in Daddy's Footsteps

"So I say, live by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature... Since you live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit." Galatians 5:16 & 25

What does "living by the Spirit" and keeping in "step with the Spirit" look like? That's the big question I've been pondering. And an image is beginning to emerge.

Me, God's little girl, following Him through each step and moment of life.

So, where do these steps lead, I wonder?

I think they lead to dying to self. "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me." Mark 8:34

Oohh. That sounds scary, doesn't it?! Certainly sounds painful.

What comfort can I take in this path?

That Christ lives in me (Gal. 2:20). That God is greater than he that is in this world (1 Jn 4:4). That He is doing a good work in me and bringing it to completion (Phil 1:6). That these light and momentary troubles are preparing me for a glory that far outweighs them all (2 Cor. 4:17). That Daddy, Abba Father, CARES for me and LOVES me and heaps all the GRACE imaginable on me. He protects me, is my fortress, my refuge, my comfort, my sustainer, my peace, my joy, my strength... And the list could go on and on!

Down to the practicality of following in Daddy's footsteps. What does that look like in everyday life?

SURRENDER is the answer that came to mind. As I go about my daily life I choose to abide with Christ and be surrendered to Him and to the Holy Spirit's leading.

Do I eat when I'm not hungry? Do I eat past full? Or am I eating in moderation, not making an idol out of food (Col 3:5) and being content with my portion (Psalm 16:5-6)? Am I opening wide my mouth so that He can fill it, filling up on God Himself and His words(Psalm 81:10)?

REFLECTION: I have been more consistent with hunger/fullness this past week, praise God. But I still have seen the seeds of greed creep up (I must confess tonight was probably the toughest one over the past five days). And my weight has certainly NOT been reflecting a surrendered heart in this area. However I have been HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY for God's word and for memorizing scripture (this is very new to me and quite shocking actually...definitely a God-thing!).

Do I say those juicy words of gossip? Do I speak those cutting words that would feel so good in the moment but be so destructive in the long run? Do I speak mindlessly and thoughtlessly? Or is my conversation full of grace and seasoned with salt? (Col. 4:6) Am I saying words that are helpful for building others up? (Eph. 4:29)

REFLECTION: I have been very conscious of the times that I have slipped up in this area this week. I have had to run to the Lord for forgiveness quite a few times unfortunately. I've been very conscious of my speech with my kids and husband, being much more vigilant and alert to the enemy's attacks and temptations. As a result I've noticed I, through God's grace and power, have been able to be more patient and loving with my kids. I know this greatly benefits them in the long run.

Do I spend the extra money on myself and turn a blind eye to the poor and needy? Or do I sacrifice just a small bit of our luxury and indulgences to help someone in much more dire need then me (Isaiah 58:7, 10)?

REFLECTION: I don't feel good about my spending lately. I'm so behind on my budgetting updates. And I don't feel good about how much I contribute to those in need. On the flip side, we booked our tickets to Mexico for summer and will once again go, as a family, to help out at the orphanage and in their community. This gets me pretty excited! My heart's desire is that we can help those in need more and more and more and more and more...and focus on our own comforts and stuff less and less and less and less!!!

Do I spend my free time in front of the TV or computer and ignore filling up on Him and His word? Or am I filling up my mind and heart with His word, feasting on God Himself (Psalm 63)?

REFLECTION: This week has gone better in that department then a lot of other weeks. I've stayed away from the computer for the most part. Just spent a few minutes each day checking email and reading a couple blog posts. And I really didn't even watch TV. It was good to spend more time with the Lord as a result. He was my Satisfaction this week.

Choices... So many choices.

And thoughts... So many thoughts.

Each moment, of each day, I have thoughts which lead me to either continue following in Daddy's footsteps OR tempt me to take the fork in the road and gratify the desires of my sinful flesh.

Each thought must be taken captive and made obedient to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5). Every thought must line up with God's truth. I need to filter each thought, asking if this is "right" in God's eyes. The Holy Spirit will empower me not to gratify those desires as I allow Him to "filter" those thoughts.

As I surrender to His leading and prompting I continue following in Daddy's footsteps. What a beautiful picture for me to dwell on. I do SO trust my Daddy Abba Father and want to please Him. But oh how hard that can be! I'll close with one of my latest favorite verses, which has greatly encouraged me...

"And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work." 2 Corinthians 9:8

Thank you Lord for not leaving me to just wave about on my own, trying to fill your big footsteps! Thank you for equipping me! Thank you for your Holy Spirit leading the way! And thank you for lovingly walking alongside me through this entire journey of life leading to eternity spent with You! What amazing grace and love! Amen.

Hope

Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
Isaiah 40:28-31

The first thing that hit me was the statement in verse 29 "he increases the power of the weak."

This leads me to the verse in Romans 12...

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. Romans 12:9-10

I feel weak. I am well aware of my failing and shortcomings. But He pours out His grace into my life. He is glorified through my weaknesses. He empowers me when I am weak. For when I am weak, then I am strong...

Back to reflecting on Isaiah 40:28-31, the key is to "hope" in the Lord.

I was reading the final lesson of the Beth Moore Breaking Free study and finished this lesson feeling so encouraged. She unpacked what the word "hope" in the context of Isaiah 40:31 means...

The Hebrew word for hope (KJV "wait upon") is qawah meaning "to bind together (by twisting)...to be gathered together, to be joined; to meet; to lie in wait for someone; to expect...to be confident, trust; to be enduring."

Inserting those synonyms in place of the words "hope in" for verse 31 would look like this...

But those who "bind together, are gathered together, are joined with the" Lord will renew their strength.

But those who "meet with the" Lord will renew their strength.

But those who "lie in wait for the" Lord will renew their strength.

But those who "expect, are confident in, trust in the" Lord will renew their strength.

But those who "endure in the" Lord will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they
will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:31

What a great reminder of what it means to truly "hope" in the Lord.

So today I chose to join with, meet with, lie in wait of, confidently expect and trust in, endure in the Lord.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile." Jeremiah 29:11-14

I will call upon the Lord. I will come and pray to Him. I will aim to seek Him with all my heart.

Heavenly Father,
Thank you for increasing my strength and helping me run and not grow weary, walk and not grow faint. Thank you Lord for listening to me, revealing yourself to me, and promising to bring me back from captivity. I choose to hope in you alone. Amen.

Willful Rebellion lined up with God's Truth

Day 14 of Thin Within is called "Choosing to Build on Truth." Here's a quote from Thin Within on pg 148:

The next time you face the pantry, refrigerator, or cookie jar, and you're really not hungry, ask yourself what you believe about your quest to become a vibrant, healthy temple of God. Ask yourself (and the Lord) what actions would follow if you were to believe what God's Word of truth says about you? God has promised to empower you so that your actions reap results that give glory to Him and an abiding joy within.

The Thin Within book has an exercise on pg 148 where you list your belief, what actions follow and then what the results are. I've done this exercise before and found it quite powerful. That being said, it's time to pick apart some of the thoughts that I noticed line the walls of my mind in certain times of temptations and then find scriptures to line up my thinking with the mind of Christ, keeping in mind that I am under the canopy of God's grace. So here goes... When I'm willfully rebellious I am thinking...and Scripture says...


1.) I (SELF) am the most important. My desires are the most important. I want what I want when I want it...and I get what I want.

Jesus replied: “'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” Matthew 22:37

For you, O LORD, are the Most High over all the earth; you are exalted far above all gods. Psalm 97:9

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; Proverbs 3:5

everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made. Isaiah 43:7

So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. 1 Corinthians 10:31

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20

God is above all. I am His creation. My job is to glorify Him in all I do, trusting Him and loving Him with my heart, soul, mind and strength. It is NOT glorifying to Him when I gratify the desires of my flesh.


2.) I've tried calling out to God in the midst of temptation before and it hasn't worked, so why bother trying?

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. 1
Corinthians 10:13

Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13-14

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; James 1:2-7

Why bother??? Because God promises that perseverance is developped and perseverance must finish its work so that I may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. Plus I am being called to press on, forgetting what is behind (all those past failures) so that I may win the prize (eternal life). That's worth it! God promises a way out of temptation, an escape route. I need to keep pressing on and looking for that way out and praying that promise. And then of course there is the truth recalled in the previous point...my greatest purpose in life is to glorify God in all I do.


3.) It will make me feel so much better (to eat that ice cream etc)--more energy, more enjoyment etc.

There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death. Proverbs 14:12

Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more. Eph 4:19

Taste and see that the LORD is good; Psalm 34:8

My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you. Psalm 63:5

Open wide your mouth and I will fill it. Psalm 81:10

Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare. Isaiah 55:2

It may make me feel better temporarily, but ultimately I will have a continual lust for more, food will never truly satisfy and it will lead to continued captivity. God promises to satisfy me more then even the richest foods. HE will fill me up.


4.) Just get it done and over with. I can't resist. Why bother?

"everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made." Isaiah 43:7

So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. 1 Corinthians 10:31

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Gal. 5:1

and do not give the devil a foothold. Ephesians 4:27

Why bother??? Because God created me for His glory and I am to glorify Him in ALL I do, even my eating and drinking. Because, once again perseverance must finish its work so that I may be complete and mature spiritually, not lacking anything. God desires me to be FREE, not a captive! "Don't give the devil a foothold!" has been resonating with me today.


5.) God doesn't care about this one time, does He? He'd forgive me anyways, right?

Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Romans 12:9

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Eph 4:30

Of course He cares about this one time! One time piles on top of another time on top of another time which becomes a mountain eventually! God is saddened by my sin. He wants me to hate what is evil and cling to what is good and never give the devil a foothold.


6.) I sin. God forgives. I can count on that!

What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? Or don't you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life. Romans 6:1-4

What a rotten attitude I have! God forgives me. I certainly can count on that. But it is “greasy grace” to think that this is license to continue sinning with no concern for true repentance. If I love God with my whole heart, soul, mind and strength I will NOT want to grieve Him and I will want to turn to Him to satisfy me and fill me up. I will want to move far away from sin and ever so much closer to Him!



This willful rebellion is just one of the temptation points, triggers (fat/flesh machinery), that I face on a regular basis. My prayer is, "Keep your servant, Christina, also from willful sins; may they not rule over me." (Psalm 19:13)

My next step is to formulate a plan in the midst of willful rebellion.

So, what is my plan of action, breaking a link in the chain??? I guess I need to apply these truths of Scripture to these moments now. It's test time! I need to be a "doer" of God's Word, not just a hearer.

Today I was standing at the counter and was wanting to reach for some sweet treats and the verse that popped into my head was "don't give the devil a foothold." I think that may be one of the truths I will have near and dear to my heart for awhile. Because that is what I'm doing when I give in with those small little temptations. It may seem insignificant and small, but in all honesty, my willful rebellion in those moments are giving a foothold (which I liken to a rung on a ladder) to Satan. And I want no part in that!!!

I plan to get a small spiral bound notebook and write some of the Scriptures that seem most benenficial down on these pages, and attach it to a necklace of some sort so I can wear it around the kitchen! That's when I'm most tempted so I thought that may be a good reminder for me to really apply these truths. I'll get that notebook asap. Just have to get to the store. The first verse I'm going to print out is "and do not give the devil a foothold." I will aim to memorize whichever scriptures are in this little notebook.

And I will also continue watching and praying, putting up that "keep away" sign, saying aloud as Jesus did "Get away Satan, for it is written..." and praying the promises of the Lord.

Well, that's enough from me today. I appologize to those of you who read my blog, for being so long winded. I guess this blog is just my way of processing everything (essentially my journal) and it all spews out here, each and every thought that runs through my head and heart!!!

The Lord's Table~Day 7, 8, 9

Day 7~Happy Are the Helpless

This lesson has resonated with me a number of times over the weekend because I truly feel quite helpless and starving for Jesus! For quite some time now I have felt very convicted how sinful I am. I have clearly seen the foothold satan has in my life, particularly in regards to eating. I know I am not glorifying God in all that I do.

This lesson was an encouragement to me because it reminded me that God is near me, does not despise me, dwells with me, revives me, esteems me and offers healing...as I humbly approach Him with empty hands.

Emptiness precedes fullness. We cannot receive from God until we have empty hands. He who recornizes he has nothing to offer God will receive everything from God.

A starving heart will give all to have the Bread of Life. It is only the hungry that sense their need of Jesus, not the full. TLT workbook
pg21

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Day 8~The Cross

Overeating is defined as continuing to eat past the point of receving all we need to sustain our lives. TLT pg24

Oooh.... I have gone past the point of satisfying hunger many times based on that definition.

This lesson zones in on how sin separates us from God and how Jesus Christ is the solution to this problem. Jesus died on the cross to pay the price for my sin. Thank you, Jesus.

I appreciated the following words...

The purpose of Jesus' death is two-fold: first, that He might remove my sins from me and second, that He might heal me from going astray and bring me back to God. It is GOD'S work to remove our sins from us, it is GOD'S work to heal us from going astray and it is GOD'S work to cause us to return to the Shepherd and Overseer of our souls. TLT workbook pg25

And then the lesson moves into reflecting on (1) what I used to be, (2) what God has done and (3) what I am now.

(1) I used to be completely undisciplined in my eating. I can remember as a teenager, arriving home after school and digging right into a massive bowl of ice cream. I would sneak food as my cravings would hit. Even within the past couple years I can see myself at the kitchen counter eating cupcake, after cupcake, after cupcake as my cravings seemed insatiable. Sadly, I remember that I VERY rarely experienced true physiological hunger.

(2) God has done a good work in me (and continues!). He has equipped me, strengthened me, convicted me, loved me, shown His mercy and grace to me. He continues to convict me and impresses on me the need for further surrender. As I repented and sought to glorify Him with my eating, turning to His Word for guidance I began to experience hunger regularily throughout each and every day. Thin Within sure helped align my thinking with God's Word, for which I am very thankful. I began to experience real gratitude and appreciation for all the gifts He gives. The tentacle of greed and gluttony began to gradually loosen their grip on my heart. And, all glory be to God, I released over 20 pounds in six months!

(3) Currently I'm still struggling with some roots of greed for food that still remain dug down deep in the soil of my heart. I'm experiencing a level of victory but I see that it is still incomplete. I'm still often serving two master--God and food. So I continue to move forward seeking God in this area of my life.

Probably the most powerful portion of this lesson for me was the following quote...

The reason that we are showing it [overeating] to be a sin is because
we must learn to abhor our sinful eating addictions and habits. We must begin to detest them with all of our being, and to think of them as a sin against our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, in order to truly turn away from them and find victory. TLT workbook pg27

Oh how I long to HATE the sin of overeating and eating outside the boundaries of 0-5! I really and truly want to HATE and DETEST that!!!! I don't want to trivialize this sin or make exceptions left right and center!


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Day 9~Living Water

The story of the woman at the well, from John 4, is the main focus of this lesson. I love this story and the picture it paints. This lady needed water and Jesus was there to offer so much more. He doesn't offer a bandaid. He doesn't offer her just a single cup of water. He digs down deep and heals. He offers a never ending, overflowing WELL of LIVING water!!! That's pretty cool!

I know in the past I was looking for that bandaid and that single cup of water. I was not focussing on God as my source of motivation and strength. I was definitely not drinking of the Living Water.

I want this to change...permanently. I want to drink of the Living Water~Jesus.

More of Him. Less of me. May I decrease and Him increase. Amen.

A Quick Update

I made it through the evening without eating, PRAISE GOD! And that was even with Jon eating a big bowl of ice cream right beside me on the couch! I'm thankful that God helped me through. And I definitely love that verse...

He must INCREASE but I must decrease. John 3:30

Thanks Lord for being WILLING to increase in my life!

That's true grace and mercy!

I can't...But God, You can

I just wanted to highlight a few quotes from TW chapter 11 that stood out to me in my reading this morning...

As we begin to take captive all of our thoughts that are contrary to
Christ's and replace them with the truth of God's Word, we will want to give Him our bodies and our lives... Not only are you a temple, a sanctuary in which God has chosen to dwell, but you are set apart by Him and for Him. TW p. 111

True Freedom:

As we surrender ourselves to Him we experience the joy and abundance of a life lived on the edge of adventure. We won't know what comes next, but His provision supplies and equips us for everything to which He calls us. He empowers us to run the race with endurance. We can live in peace, knowing that our lives belong to God, that we are His responsibility. This is true freedom. TW p. 112

This was a great reminder!

Our Lord has purchased your PARDON.
Our Lord has purchased your PROVISION.
Our Lord's PRESENCE is always at your side.
Our Lord's POWER is available to you in any moment. TW p. 114

And this quote really struck me as worth pondering... I love the last sentence.

Bible teacher and author, Kay Arthur, says "Don't struggle in self-effort to be better. Don't determine that you are going to 'try harder.'
Acknowledge your need of His all-sufficient grace and go forward, surrendering and trusting in the power of God's transforming grace. 'As you therefore have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him' (Col. 2:6). You were saved by faith; therefore, you are to walk in faith. It may be one step at a time, but walk. You can say, 'I can't,' as long as in the next breath you say, 'But God, You can.'" TW p. 114

Today's the Day!

I'm not sure why I feel the way I do today...but I feel like TODAY is the day to really start fresh and get completely back on track. (maybe I'll be eating my words later...hopefully not!!) It just feels like something "clicked" and I feel like I am truly ready to commit. So, hopefully that's not just a "feeling"! As I read TW day 4 this morning it drove home for me that I really don't want to be on this path of my own performance (where I'm failing so often and seeing greed rear it's ugly head so often). I truly desire to be on the path of God's provision, observing (confessing) and correcting (repenting). I want to trust God to meet my needs and satisfy me the way nothing else can ever satisfy.

Our VBS theme this week was "God is our greatest treasure!" How true that is! He is truly the GREATEST treasure! And He has given me the opportunity to get to know Him, to be in right relationship with Him through His grace and mercy and sacrifice, and I also have the opportunity to walk side by side with Him and experience the provision of His power, peace, presence, joy and so much more! Praise God!

Camping Update

What an amazing six days it has been! I have thoroughly enjoyed spending so much time outdoors and in God's creation. It was wonderful camping with friends for our first three nights, catching up, having some heart-to-hearts and just hanging out together. Then it was nice to have some time for just our family the past two nights. My heart is filled with thanksgiving and gratitude for who God is and all the ways he cares for me. Thank you Lord.

Down to the nitty gritty details of the week!! My eating was mostly within 0-5 this week. However I did notice the roots of some greed rear its head... Since I was journalling my thoughts this week I figure I'll just post these...

Saturday, June 28th
I was reading TW chapter 14 and these are the things that stuck out to me:
"For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose." Phil 2:13
"For sin shall not be master over you for you are not under law but under grace." Romans 6:14
* The Lord will reveal His perfect will for you. (Romans 12:2)
* Empowered by his grace--interesting thought
Gratitude log here.

Sunday, June 29th
Eating observation: I felt a little greedy for sugar this evening.
What a perfect chapter to start off camping...inviting God into each and every moment of my life, practising His presence. Just the reminder I needed. Thank you, Lord.
Gratitude log here.

Monday, June 30th
Eating observation: Too much sugar
Correction: Go for what I'm craving FIRST...rather then eating a whole bunch of other teasers and then finally going for what I was craving in the first place!
Gratitude log here.

Tuesday, July 1st
I'm really off this evening. Lord forgive me. It's not just my eating...it's my emotions too.
I've been very tired. My guard has definitely been down. I've given in to temptation. Father, help me live a surrendered life to you. I'm not even sure what I could do to correct today....maybe the munchie mix was my downfall...definitely think it was. I feel saddened that I'm not the best role model for my kids in regards to eating in moderation. Father forgive me for this too.
Gratitude log here.

Wednesday, July 2nd
I feel like I'm mindlessly eating tonight at supper. Did I even really invite God into each moment of this meal? If I had I would have turned to Him for strength to resist temptation and make good choices.

Reflecting on TW ch. 18:
"I am carrying on a great project and cannot go down. Why should the work stop while I leave it and go down to you?" Neh. 6:3

What a great reminder to persevere and maintain godly boundaries!

I wonder if I stepped over a godly boundary at lunch by having chips. I just observed yesterday that my supper eating went off because of the overconsumption of the munchie mix in the afternoon. I think I set myself up for the same situation today. I could have simply saved some chips for later if I was craving them so much.

"My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you." Psalm 63:5

Gratitude log here.

Thursday, July 3rd
Reflecting on TW ch. 19:
"In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength." Is. 30:15
What a neat verse! Something to ponder.

Also, reflecting on Ps. 32:1-5 I find it interesting to note that failing to acknowledge sin results in what I see as soul suffering--bones wasting, groaning, God's hand heavy upon, strength sapped.

One thing I noticed last night is that s'mores are a bit of a teaser for me. Not 100% satisfying so why do I eat so many?! Maybe I should just eat one for the fun of it and then eat the separate part (probably just the chocolate!) if I'm wanting more!

Gratitude log here.


In summary...

I've had some wonderful time with the Lord, with family and friends this week. I'm so thankful for God's strength this week. I'm also thankful for the TW book which is so packed full of godly insights and wisdom!

I didn't follow my pre-planned menu...yet all that thinking ahead of time did prepare me to make better choices. I pretty much just went with the flow and ate what I was craving within 0-5.

The two things I noted that seemed to be flesh machinery for me when camping are: munchies/chips and sweets (particularily s'mores).

My plan of action is...

Munchies--aim to eat very specific portion sizes. I think I'll actually portion out the munchies ahead of time so that I stick within a more moderate amount.

Sweets--s'mores...just eat one and then focus on more pleasing pleasers:-) Other sweets I just need to slow down and savour and continue sticking with 0-5 eating.

Well, enough from me for now! This is getting long winded as usual!!

Hinderances

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. " Hebrews 12:1

This verse resonated with me this morning. I'm wondering what exactly hinders me? What sins do I so easily get tangled and trapped in?

I know that I often want to make exceptions to eat when not hungry. This certainly hinders me as I push God away, tuning out what I know He is saying to me.

I know another thing that hinders me is when I choose to eat more then I should, pushing me past #5. I have come to an awareness of some of the cues my body gives me when I have reached the end of #5. And yet I so often choose to ignore those cues and God's voice which speaks to me through this time trying to direct me towards the way out of the temptation.

Past failures also hinder my progress.

These are the first things that come to mind as I reflect. There are probably more that will come to mind as I meditate on this verse more over the next while.

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such oppostition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Hebrews 12:2-3

The solution? I need to fix my eyes on Jesus! I need to dwell in His presence every single moment of every single day. What a difference that would make! I need to live under the canopy of His grace and provision. I need to rely on Him for strength and power...not on my own effort. Jesus sacrificed so incredibly much to make a way for us to be right with God. I need to fix my eyes on His sacrifice... What I have to sacrifice will seem oh so insignificant with that focus!

Thin Again - ch 7

Chapter 7
The Present Not the Past

As I read this chapter I found it interesting how a few verses that had been standing out to me recently were highlighted in this chapter. One of the verses was Matthew 18:21-22 which I had highlighted in my counting my blessings blog.

"Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, 'Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?' Jesus answered, 'I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.'"

Another one was Mark 11:25.

"And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."

And lastly the one that has been on my mind and heart often is 2 Corinthians 10:5.

"We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

I feel God is talking to me about forgiveness a lot lately! I have been reading another book called "The Power of a Postive Wife" by Karol Ladd and once again teaching on forgiveness was taught.....on a particular day when I was having trouble forgiving Jon! Go figure! I'm thankful that God showed me my sin because our marriage relationship was needing a good dose of forgiveness and right relationship was restored as a result:-) Thank you, Lord!

I have felt convicted of the many times my thoughts are dark and mucky and sinful. Oh how I need to take captive every thought for Christ. The problem is that once the thought enters my mind it often gets spoken out loud and another sin gets committed as I gossip/slander or simply am not shining for Christ by letting my conversation always be filled with grace (Col. 4:6). So, I'm working on this one... I have to be on guard and prayerful against that little seed of negativity that creeps into my thoughts.

TA chapter 7 was a pretty heavy duty one! For many people this must be a very tough read. As I read some of the stories of individuals who walked through such deep waters my heart just ached and tears came to my eyes. I pray for each person who has to go through this pain. Here goes a quick summary of the pretty weight things things touched on in TA chapter 7.

What are the stages of the grieving process?
1.) Denial—“denied reality of our painful past” TA pg 118
2.) Anger—“While it is legitimate and necessary to experience the anger in the present, the goal is not revenge or abuse of self or another. The goal is to sweep your house clean, to purify your heart so that new life can dwell within you.” TA pg 119
3.) Bargaining
4.) Depression—“During this stage you may experience the full measure of the loss of food as a friend… As you feel permission to grieve this loss, you may be assured that this is a sign of health, a sign that you are releasing something you have coveted or have clung to—your old eating habits and your image of yourself and your world.” TA pg 119
5.) Acceptance—“occurs when we are ready to let go. It comes when we are fully aware of and honest about the past and have made peace with it.” TA pg 120

Define forgiveness.
“The definition we use is to cease to feel resentment for, as to forgive an offense; to renounce anger; to grant pardon without harbouring resentment.” TA pg 122
“Forgiveness is a process rather than a one-time event, and the resentment and anger may recede only with time.” TA pg127

“Forgiveness is release.” TA pg125

What is resentment?
“Resentment turns our hopes and desires into demands, and perpetuates those expectations and demands in circumstances where it is not appropriate. Binding our present relationships to the unresolved emotions of the past holds us and the other person prisoner, keeps us the victim and obstructs the possibility of genuine love and intimacy.” TA pg124

Why do we hesitate to forgive another person?
"We may think that fogiveness implies we are condoning the behavior of the offender. Or we may fear that we’re saying what happened was really not so bad… We may hesitate to forgive because we think that forgiveness necessarily requires reconciliation…”TA pg 126

What are the four steps to forgiveness?
1.) We begin by agreeing with God.
2.) We choose to forgive.
3.) We do it.
4.) We act out forgiveness and our emotions may follow.

How can we take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ?
1.) We can write down our feelings.
2.) We can pray about our feelings.
3.) We can picture ourselves experiencing our feelings cradled in Jesus’ loving embrace. TA pg133

Heavenly Father, I lift up in prayer those who have experienced deep hurts and wounds in their lifetime. We know that the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express (Romans 8:26). I pray you would bring forgiveness, healing, and restoration to their lives. I pray they would be able to see that all things work together for the good of those who love you (Romans 8:28).

I ask that you would continue convicting me of my sin. Please give me a tender heart to your leading and to your holy spirit's nudging. Help me be quick to forgive. Please help me also be mindful of each thought that enters my head. I pray that my thinking would be surrendered to You. Thank you for your forgiveness, mercy and grace. In Jesus name, amen.

Wednesday update

Here's what I wrote on Sunday...
I'm going to the school to help with the "Taste of Egypt" party. There will be lots of food around. I will maybe just skip/eat a light breakfast that day and enjoy the variety of food samples that will be served in the morning. I'll likely be busy for much of the time, but will probably be eating some samples a little later.

Unfortunately, I need to be completely transparent with everyone and say I have really not done well today with my eating. One of my biggest "fat machinery" triggers is tiredness...and that was a huge factor today. I wasn't hungry for breakfast and at 11am (still don't think I was at #0...though I may have been too busy to notice!) when it was time to taste the samples I started to munch... Then on top of that I had some company for lunch...and the munching continued. And then more munching after that...

I thank God for His grace which I know He freely offers me...and boy do I need a lot of it!

Lord, I am so sorry for not being obedient. I choose to follow You. I want my life to be glorifying to You in ALL I say and do. In Jesus name, amen.

Since I just figured out how to post a youtube video properly I'll close off this post with a song which really moved me tonight...

"East to West" by Casting Crowns

Feelings of Failure

I have really been struggling with feelings of failure lately. It's like I've hit a road block again. I believe I'm a failure (I can hear satan screaming these lies in my head), I then behave like a failure and now I'm feeling the effects of this behaior... I feel dissatisfied with myself, and in turn am more irritable with my family and had to seek their forgiveness (which they graciously and freely offered).

I thought these statements and verses from "Who I am in Christ" by Neil Anderson (and found on pg 125 of TW) would be good reminders for myself at this time....
I am a new creature
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" 2 Corinthians 5:17

I am established to the end
"He will keep you strong to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ." 1 Cor. 1:8

I am brought near by the blood of Christ
"But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ." Eph 2:13

I am more than a conqueror
"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us." Rom 8:37

I am sealed with the promise of the Holy Spirit
"And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit..." Eph 1:13

I am being changed into His image
"being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Phil 1:6

I have all my needs met by God according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus
"And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus." Phil 4:19

I can do all things through Jesus Christ
"I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Phil 4:13

I press toward the goal for the prize of the high calling of God
"I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Phil 3:14


These verses (highlighted in TW ch 12) also really spoke to me:

"And God is able to make all grace abound to you,

so that in all things at all times,

having all that you need,

you will abound in every good work."

2 Cor. 9:8

"But he said to me,

'My grace is sufficient for you,

for my power is made perfect in weakness.'

Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses,

so that Christ's power may rest on me."

2 Cor. 12:9

Thank you, Lord, for your word. Thank you for your grace that provides me with all I need to do good works. Thank you for using my weaknesses for your glory. I grab hold of the promise that the testing of my faith develops perseverance, so that I may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. (James 1:2-4). I move forward in your strength and power alone. In Jesus name, amen.

Observing and Correcting

I got thinking more about observation and correction over the past couple days. I have noticed I can pretty easily make observations about my choices (good or poor). But often I haven't taken my observations one step further and actually came up with ways to correct and change my behavior.

When I observe and note my poor choices I am confessing my sin to God. (I changed the wording here from "repenting" to "confessing" as it expresses my perspective more effectively!) I know I have acted in my own strength and not been willing to surrender and look to Him for His strength. The next step is to "produce fruit in keeping with repentance." (Matthew 3:8)

I don't want to be like this image!
"As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly." Proverbs 26:11

I know that God is a loving God.
"But you, O Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness." Psalm 86:15

And I know that "sin shall not be your (*my*) master, because you are (*I am*) not under law, but under grace." Romans 6:14

"If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land."
When I read Chronicles 7:14 I am filled with hope as I know that God hears, He forgives and He heals.

I desire my heart to be "good soil" as outlined in the parable of the sower.
"But the seed on good soil stands for those with a noble and good heart, who hear the word, retain it, and by persevering produce a crop."

Luke 8:15

Heavenly Father, please forgive me for so often sinning by knowing the good I ought to do but not doing it. Forgive me for often taking your grace and mercy for granted and falling into a "slippery grace" kind of mentality. I don't want to just give you lip service and say "sorry" and then not turn from my ways. Please help me grow in this area and turn from my ways and follow you. Thank you for hearing my call, for your forgiveness and mercy and for the healing and restoration you provide. Help me rely on you alone for strength. Help me persevere and produce fruit in keeping with repentance. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Thin Again - ch 4 Questions

Chapter 4:
Conscious Eating Not Compulsive Eating

What does the word “deliver” mean?
a rescue from the power of.

What does the word “freedom” mean?
God rescues us from the things that prevent us from living by faith.

What is “fat machinery”?
Anything that makes you eat when you’re not at “0”. I think of it as triggers. Ones that the author pinpoints are: conditioned and habitual responses, old unworkable beliefs, scales, past experiences and failures.

List any fat machinery that may have contributed to your disordered eating.

1. I bake, I eat—taste test trap…and often the trap continues to lure me if it is a sugary treat.
2. I’ve got to finish up this tempting food item so I’m not going to be tempted by it anymore.
3. It’s mealtime.
I enjoy food a lot and relish hot items hot out of the oven. To wait often means settling for less tasty food. I find baked items continue to tempt me when they are in the house as I have quite a sweet tooth.

4. I’m already off track so it’s license to stay off track!
5. I have failed so often, I will probably fail again.
This one has plagued me over and over again. It’s all about each moment and each choice.

6. Social events.
When it comes to social events I just let my guard down and find it hard to focus on the other, more important, reasons (other then food) for the social time.

7. I don’t want to wait for hunger.
Greed once again at the heart of the matter. Also, at times there are practical reasons. I find those a bit more tricky to deal with.

8. I’m tired and need a pick-me-up.
When I’m tired I find that I figure food will give me that extra energy boost I need….it often does. Eating after hosting company is another thing I’ve been in the habit of. I tend to not enjoy my food as much when I’m hosting (as I focus on all the details and on the company), plus I’ve usually made something extra tasty and sweet, so after company leaves I often just want to relax, kick up my feet and have that one last little treat.

What is true hunger?
“True hunger is a physical sensation in the body caused by the need for food.” TA pg 71

This link describes hunger quite well. I also liked this quick summary of the Weigh Down book's eating when you're hungry approach.

What is appetite?
“Appetite is a habitual desire for some gratification, either of the body or the mind, that food won’t satisfy even though we think it will.” TA pg. 71

How has your bathroom scale been part of your fat machinery?
“What happens when you wake up in the morning, step onto the bathroom scale, and see (arghhh!) that you’ve gained two pounds? You decide that your current efforts to lose weight aren’t working, so in your frustration what do you want to do? EAT! And what happens when you step onto the bathroom scale and see (yeah!) that you’ve “lost” a few pounds? What do you want to do? EAT! You decide to celebrate your victory with a hot fudge sundae, right? Either way the act of weighing has not served you.” TA pg. 74

This describes what I’ve experienced quite thoroughly. At times I can detach myself from the mastery of the scale in these instances and allow it to simply be a feedback tool, but at other times it simply does exactly as described above. It is a fine balancing act for me. I would like it if the scale would have no power over me. At this point in my journey I’m concentrating on the 0-5 eating being “scale”.

Write your understanding of the grace principle of observation and correction.
I simply acknowledge and note when I have made a choice that works contrary to 0-5 eating. I try to take note what I did and why I did it. This is my way of acknowledging before God that I have not been obedient and say “sorry”.

Correction (which I haven’t noted as much as observations) is what I can do different next time so I don’t make the same mistake again. It essentially is the conclusion of “sorry” as I repent and turn away… I think it is time to take note of corrections more often so I can change and grow more.

“A grace-oriented approach allows us to observe our behavior and correct it when we recognize that it does not serve our goals or God’s purpose for us.” TA pg 79

"Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat." F. Scott Fizgerald

Thin Again - ch 3 Questions

Chapter 3 – Grace not Legalism

What is God’s grace?
God’s grace is a “dynamic outpouring (that) was made in flesh in Jesus Christ. Christ became the new offering—the means of attonement and reconciliation—for our sin and guilt... God, in his grace, not only offers forgiveness, but gives us the power (through the faith in the indwelling Christ) to become sons and daughters—bearers of his character and will... It is this love, this outpouring of God’s grace, that works the transformation of our innermost being so that we delight in pleasing him—indeed, live to please him. When we love Christ and our desire is to please him in everything, we are released from clinging to rules, regulations, and performance.” TA pg 54

“Grace is the active expression of God’s love. Grace empowers us to choose rightly in what seem to be the most choiceless of situations, but it does not, and will not determine that choice.” TA pg 51


How does God’s grace work in our lives?
“Grace is freedom that conforms us from within; legalism is bondage that constrains us from without.” TA pg 52

“Grace redirects our focus away from perfection to correction.” TA pg 57

I find God’s grace so amazing! The fact that God keeps forgiving over and over again is just astounding! I appreciate applying observations and corrections in my TW journey, living under God’s grace rather then the path of my own performance. This is the reason I can continue persevering and not giving up. I know that “he who began a good work in me will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Phil 1:6


What is legalism and how does it affect our lives?
Legalism is all about rules and regulations. When following them a person can feel quite “righteous” and focus is on self. When failing to follow the rules and regulations we feel like complete failures and tend to beat ourselves up with the ‘club of condemnation’.

Legalism can be defined as a “self-defined system of control, safety, and security…. By focussing on externals---our diets, our weight, our eating or not eating—we avoid confronting the real issues in our lives: our fears, our unresolved grief, emotions, relationships, rebellion, and insecurities…. We fail to acknowledge that it is in our being (the intentions of our own hearts), not in our doing (our eating) that our true guilt lies.” TA pg 56

I often get caught up in legalistic thinking as I set myself goals with eating/exercise. I inevitably fail at some point, beat myself up about it, and then feel doomed to never succeed and have victory in this area of my life. I know that Satan is on the attack as it says, “Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” 1 Peter 5:8 I know God does not desire me to be in this cycle. He offers me His grace and His strength and power to experience surrender and victory in this area. Jesus says "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Cor. 12:9


List the Thin Within principles for weight mastery.
1. Eat when your body is hungry (‘0’).
2. Eat in a calm environment by reducing distractions.
3. Eat when sitting.
4. Eat when your body and mind are relaxed.
5. Eat and drink the things your body enjoys.
6. Pay attention to your food while eating.
7. Eat slowly, savouring each bite.
8. Stop before your body is full (‘5’).

“These principles apply to all the food you eat and all the beverages you drink, except water. Coffee, tea, alcohol, and diet sodas are included, because everything, except water, affects your body’s ability to register accurately its physiological hunger.” TA pg 61

I assume they would also classify an herbal tea (no sugar/cream) as similar?? I’m surprised at that. Not sure if I agree….


What is the Bodometer Process?
“It is a tool for turning our attention inward and listening to the signals our bodies are giving us in order to determine whether food (or something else) is needed.” TA pg 63

Basically it is paying attention to each different part of my body—mouth/teeth, throat, stomach and abdomen.


What is the hunger scale and how can it serve you?
0 = hungry/empty
5= comfortable or satisfied
10=stuffed

The aim should be to eat within 0-5. Eating 3-7 results in overeating and not losing weight.

April 14

April 14th food log:
(Chapter 12)

I can relate to “greasy grace”!
“What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?” Romans 6:1-2

I weighed in at 167lbs today. I plan on weighing myself more frequently, at least for a time. I also think I need to assess my progress/success once again. I can see that discontinuing that has in many ways been the beginning of my “greasy grace” approach. I also need to be more mindful of eating to a #5 as I think I’ve been going past that comfy point far too often. I remember Jon saying years ago how he would “shrink his stomach” which always sounded absurd….but it really made sense as he would reduce the amount he consumed and his stomach began to be satisfied with less and less. I need to start “shrinking my stomach” too! (in more ways then one of couse!)