Challenge #7 ~ Pay Attention

Time is flying by and this week brings me to another Thin Within key to conscious eating on which to focus. This week's key is:

Pay attention to my food while eating.

During many of your meals you will dine with others. We are enriched both by our interaction with others and by the nourishment and delight provided by the food we eat. We experience maximum satisfaction as we give our full attention to each in turn. How can you apply this key? We suggest that you attempt to establish a rhythm as you eat. Look at your food, take a bite, chew deliberately, and fully experience the flavor. Then set your fork down and focus on your companions, giving them your full attention. Return to focus on your food and continue this back-and-forth process. As you practice this rhythm, you will be able to do this without giving it much thought. Your meals will be more intentional and more enjoyable. TW pg 10

I was just thinking that I often try to do this when I'm in social situations...and somehow don't remember this point when eating regular family dinners. Yet every meal with my family is essentially a "social situation". I think it is time for me to apply this to every meal we share as a family. These are the meals I most often struggle with anyways.

Anyone else have any thoughts, insights, tips in regards to this week's challenge? Anyone else joining me on these weekly challenges? I'd love to hear from you!

Ironic Timing!

Last night, as I lay in bed, it hit me that my last post was posted with quite ironic timing! I wondered why on earth I decided to post about "excuses" when it was my birthday the very next day! I was looking forward to "treats" no matter how far outside of 0-5 boundaries they were! Now that is ironic and willfully rebellious, isn't it?! And I groaned (yes, groaned...and had a grumbly attitude!) because I knew I'd have to be accountable HERE for my choices! I have to laugh aloud at the irony of that! God must have been speaking to me last night for a reason:-)

Anyways, I will rest and lean on Jesus today. I will aim for Him to increase and for me to decrease. And I will make it my aim to joyfully and gladly try to stay within 0-5 boundaries :-) And I WILL give account for my choices today:-)

So, here is my action plan as I pre-plan for the challenges that lay ahead for the day...

Breakfast - I was hungry and enjoyed a pancake breakfast. Thanks, Lord!

Lunch - I don't think I'll be hungry for lunch after the larger breakfast....though maybe I'll be surprised:-) If I am hungry I will aim for something really light, maybe even just some juice, to ensure I'm hungry for supper.

Supper - It's dinner at my parent's place. One thing I'm prepared for is some birthday dessert there and then Jon and I have already planned to go out for DQ blizzards (at my request)... That's quite a lot of sweets potentially.... Anyways, I'll aim to savour and enjoy and eat minimal amount at supper (main course and dessert)...yet ENJOY each and EVERY SINGLE bite to the fullest as my mother is cooking a special dinner and dessert for me, bless her:-) I'll aim to drink lots of water and put my fork down between bites and focus on wonderful family times and conversation. After that Jon and I will go out for blizzards and a movie and I'll savour that as well, stopping by a #5.

I gotta end this post with a favorite scripture I memorized in the past week and which I have been praying over my kids...and would like to pray over every one of YOU, my blog readers today!

[May] The Lord bless you and keep you.
[May] The Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you.
[May] The Lord turn to you and give you peace.
(Numbers 7:24-26)
AMEN!

What lines the walls of my mind?

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Cor. 10:5

This verse is the central portion of scripture that is unpacked in week 9 of the Breaking Free study by Beth Moore. What an INCREDIBLE week of lessons this has been! I hardly know where to begin. But for now, I'll just unpack a few things that God has been unveiling to me in the past couple days.

"Give this next statement your full attention the walls of your mind will never stay bare. Never. Let's face it. Our minds work even when we sleep. Once we tear down lies, we have to re-wallpaper with truth or the enemy will happily supply a new roll of wallpaper. Different pattern maybe--a more updated look--but the same deceptive manufacturer." Breaking Free workbook by Beth Moore pg 195

The walls of my mind never stay bare.

That has been resonating in my mind.

"The question becomes, then, how do we re-wallpaper our minds with truth? First, be understanding the goal. What does God want to accomplish in our minds? We possess the mind of Christ (1 Cor. 2:16), but we still have the full capacity to think with the mind of the flesh. We are MENTALLY BILINGUAL you might say. My older daughter is almost fluent in Spanish, but she still thinks mostly in English because she practices it more. The same concept is true of you and me. We will think with the mental language we practice most." Breaking Free workbook by Beth Moore pg 195

So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. Romans 7:21-23

"We will not be free until we adopt the mind of Christ." Breaking Free workbook by Beth Moore pg 195

So, one question that has kept on turning over in my mind over and over again is "Which mental language am I practicing most?"

The truth began to become evident as I began to examine what lines the walls of my mind... I gotta tell you it felt like a HUGE surprise to me, when I got down to the nitty gritty, how many lies and deceptions of the devil I have allowed to line the walls of my mind. I feel led to share what I began to uncover... Welcome to the hidden corners, the secret places, of my mind...

When I'm willfully rebellious I am thinking...

1. I (SELF) am the most important. My desires are the most important. I want what I want when I want it...and I get what I want.
2. I've tried calling out to God in the midst of temptation before and it hasn't worked, so why bother?
3. It will make me feel so much better (to eat that ice cream etc)--more energy, more enjoyment etc.
4. Just get it done and over with. I can't resist. Why bother?
5. God doesn't care about this one time, does He? He'd forgive me anyways, right?
6. I sin. God forgives. I can count on that!

When I'm in auto pilot mode with overeating or am tempted to eat outside 0-5 I am thinking...

1. Quick, quick! Do it quickly before you have time to think or second guess. Don't even think about praying right now. Just eat it quick!
   
2. It tastes so good. More WILL satisfy me more.
3. I'm at the counter munching. This doesn't really "count."
4. I'm just "extending" my lunch/supper meal a little longer. What's the harm in that?

When I'm tired and am tempted to eat I'm thinking...

1. I need a quick pick-me-up.
2. I don't want to battle anything right now. I'm too tired. Just give me food.
   
3. Food will give me energy and give me the pick-me-up I need. Nothing else can fill that spot like food.
4. I'll deal with the guilt tomorrow. New start tomorrow.

When I'm tempted to overeat in social situations I'm thinking...

1. I don't want to insult the hostess by not eating anything (or not cleaning my plate).
2. Eat, eat, eat all the good food. This is your chance!
3. Others are eating more then me, so I am entitled to eat more.

When I'm tempted to taste test something despite not being hungry I'm thinking...

1. I gotta know how it tastes!
2. Everybody does it once in awhile!
3. Just a small bite which of course leads to...
4. Okay, since I started this cookie, I may as well eat the whole cookie. I've already fallen (slipped), why fight the urge?
5. How can I give this away if I don't know how it tastes?
6. It always tastes best when it is fresh. I don't want to miss out on that!

When sugary treats tempt me I'm thinking...

1. More of it will definitely satsify me more!
2. I can't go without something sweet in the day.
3. I NEED dessert after supper...and LOTS of it since I was "good" all day!
4. I can't resist. It feels magnetic.
5. I don't want to give this up to God. This is my special treat.
6. I want to eat this in moderation but I'm still not quite satisfied so I will eat more...
   

Out of whack shedules often get me feeling tempted and thinking...

1. Eat now. I don't want to be out (away from food) and hungry.
2. At my in-laws--this is THE mealtime. It's time to eat. Don't make a scene.
3. Hunger is somthing that MUST be fed immediately! So to be caught off guard with hunger is scary. Must meet the need IMMEDIATELY! NEED food NOW!

When I'm tempted to do some "tourist nibbling" I'm thinking...

1. Gotta eat as much of it as possible NOW because I won't get this opportunity again (or for quite awhile).
2. Taste buds are alive! My stomach feels full. Ignore the signals.
3. It's Christmas. This kind of food/baking only comes once a year!

I am in utter amazement at all the thoughts that line the walls of my mind in regards to eating. If I was to apply this exercise to other sins boy those walls are cluttered! Unbelievable! It is time to tear down the lies of Satan with the truth of God's Word. I don't want to be so mentally BILINGUAL! I truly desire to be thinking in only ONE language...with the MIND OF CHRIST. It's time to "starve the flesh and feed the spirit" (BF pg199).

Lord, help me line the walls of my mind with Your truth and may my thoughts be taken captive by You and bow down to You. I pray that You would begin to transform the walls of my mind and make me more like You each and every moment of each and every day. Please help me be victorious Lord. In Jesus name, amen.

I've been processing some of this already with truth statements and scriptures... I still have more work to do, more processing to do. I'll follow this post up later with what God reveals to me.

Accountability

I said I'd give account for the weekend... So here goes.

It didn't end up being quite as on track as I would have liked...or as the Lord would have liked is more like it! But I'm not beating myself up over it. I'm living and learning.

Thursday ended up being quite an on-track day, PTL!

Friday went smoothly until evening, even with a buffet dinner! Then when I got home I was getting the munchies and grabbed a handful of pretzels. I wanted to go much further then just a handful of pretzels let me tell you! I wanted to dig into chocolates and actually was picturing dipping pretzels into melted chocolate... And then the next image that came to mind and tempted me was a piece of hot toasted homeade bread (which i have on my counter). I knew God was calling me to leave it though and so I went down to the TV, took Vanilla my guinea pig in my lap and petted her for awhile. Made it, praise God.

I'm thankful I made it through the buffet meal victoriously, eating to a comfortable #5. I've decided I need to listen to the one body signal that i've noticed really happens frequently when I'm comfortably full--a nice little burp. I've tried to ignore it and just keep eating many times and know that is the signal that my body has enough and i need to stop *now*! So I'm planning being more vigilant in that regard.

Saturday I started out with good intentions and presented my plea for help before the Lord. I was calling out to Him. I was hungry in the morning... But then wasn't hungry before I headed to the church for play dress rehearsal and performance. So I ate at 11:30 and then the eating just seemed to go downhill from there. In the evening I ate more sugary treats then I should have after I returned from the drama performance.

On the positive note, the drama performance went AWESOME! The content of it went along the lines of a lot of content from Case for Faith and Case for Christ by Lee Strobel. My daughter was the main character, an investigative reporter, who was investigating the mystery of the manger. Her name was "Jane Blonde" playing on the James Bond character. Music would play everytime her name was said. It was a lot of fun and a really powerful script.

Sunday was so-so. I ended up getting a little overdosed on sugary stuff, despite hunger, after lunch when I was making some chocolate dipped pretzels and brownies. Too much chocolate and sugar for me. I decided to skip supper and ended up eating later after the Sunday evening drama performance when I got a little hungry.

Monday has been going well so far, praise God! Seriously! I am just so thankful for a new day and a new start:-) I have been enjoying more veggies and fruits today so far, which feels really good:-)

So, that's the rundown so far. I've gotta run though as I have to get this house back in order. My heart is praising God for helping me through some tempting moments and for constantly being near me. What an awesome God!

ThinWithin~Day 24, 25, 26

A few snapshots of what hit me in my readings the past number of days...

Chapter 24 - feel the 0 for awhile before eating. TW pg 260

I am 100% positive the book in NO way encourages anorexic behavior with these words. Rather it is a great reminder to people like me, who struggle with greed and gluttony and ultimately overeating, to not be afraid of the "0" and to really be thankful to be hungry...and then of course to feed my body when it is in need. I just appreciated the reminder that I don't have to instantly jump up and eat the second I feel hunger!

Chapter 25 - determining the purposes for eating with others.

By planning ahead to maintain your boundaries in a social setting, you can take a proactive approach. You can respond, rather than react if you plan in advance. TW pg269

I had some social eating opportunities this past weekend and did not plan appropriately. I ended up eating outside 0-5 unfortunately and didn't practice present time conscious eating. I definitely need to plan in advance more frequently.

Chapter 26 - satisfaction vs gratification

I work quite frequently on gratification. I know that it is temporary. I definitely am longing to find more satisfaction in God during those moments of temptation, rather then food.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4

Well, I continue to persevere! I keep on keeping on! I know I've not been in "the" zone lately! But I do keep pressing on. I am thankful that God promises to make me "mature and complete, not lacking anything." How awesome is that!

This weekend...

...I had pinpointed some of the temptations I would be facing and some of the possible "exit" plans that I could potentially choose so I could stay within 0-5 eating.

Unfortunately I can't say the weekend went perfectly according to the plan... I also can't say that I truly sought the Lord for help. The moments when I ate outside 0-5 were all in the midst of feelings of tiredness. I need to figure out how to truly stop and wait on the Lord in those times of weakness...

So here I give account for how I dealt with the various situations that I had highlighted in my last post:

#1. Supper at a friend's house.
I definitely ate within 0-5 for supper and with the later dessert. I had two small slices of pizza, which in all honesty is pretty much equivalent to the one larger piece I was thinking would be adequate in my exit plan. Unfortunately when I got home, at about 10pm, I had a bit more of the trifle and a small slice of pizza. I didn't feel past a #5, but definitely didn't start at a #0.

#2. Drama Practice.
Eating 0-5 went smoothly. Thanks God!

#3. & #4. Pumpkin Pie temptations & Family Dinner (mexican food).
I started our family meal feeling quite worn out and tired, and wasn't at #0. I ate a really small amount, definitely not eating past a #5. The pumpkin pie was devoured by my family (all 9 of us), so none was left behind to tempt me. However after my family left, I once again fell into wanting just a bit of a treat after I could kick back and relax....and so dug into one wagon wheel cookie.

Well, that's it for now.

Re-start.....again....

Well, I think it's time to push the re-start button again.... I feel like my eating is bordering on out-of-control again...at least tonight it was. I feel like I've had a few "off" days.

Maybe the transition of no longer publicly logging my eating has been part of the struggle. I find it interesting how I have been craving not-so-healthy choices more the past few days (which I've mostly resisted, but found it more difficult). I think it helped me stay focussed on eating more whole-body pleasers when I knew I was choosing to be transparent about each choice.

Of course it could have something to do with monthly hormone cycles too. Who knows! Whatever the case, I'm not satisfied to be in this place. I want my eyes to be on God, my Helper, my Savior.

I still desire to leave a favorite last bite of each meal as a sacrifice to the Lord, as a reflection of my surrendered heart. That will continue to be a challenge I work on. I have noticed how difficult it is! I guess the fact of the matter is that I usually eat what's on my plate and then often take one last nibble at the food in the serving dish etc. as that VERY last taste. So actually choosing to not even finish what's on my plate (even though it is just one little bite!) is a bit of a stretch for me! I think it is good to practice this as it will help me put the brakes on my eating, with my eyes on the Lord, when I am tempted to eat all the food on my plate past a #5.

I know there are a few things coming up this week that could set me off and act as triggers to eating outside 0-5. Here are the ones I know will be a little more challenging this week...

Planning for trials this week:

Monday
We're going to have a bit of an out-of-schedule kind of day as we spend a family day going biking and probably eating out (maybe just an ice cream stop). My aim will be to pack a light lunch for myself and take a very small serving of ice cream, maybe even just share Jon's ice cream treat and really savour those few bites... I like that idea:-) After our biking outing I plan on creating a "pyramid" cake for the Wed. school event (taste of egypt). I'll aim to completely avoid any of those cake trimmings or icing, except if I'm hungry of course, at which point it would just be a moderate amount.

Wednesday
I'm going to the school to help with the "Taste of Egypt" party. There will be lots of food around. I will maybe just skip/eat a light breakfast that day and enjoy the variety of food samples that will be served in the morning. I'll likely be busy for much of the time, but will probably be eating some samples a little later.

Thursday
Pizza lunch at school. I just need to make sure I'm hungry for that meal. Anytime I have to be hungry for a pre-set time I find it a little more challenging I guess. Then in the evening I'm out for coffee with a friend. Once again I will need to be alert and intentional.

One passage that has really been resonating with me the past week is Psalm 63:1-8

O God, you are my God,

earnestly I seek you;

my soul thirsts for you,

my body longs for you,

in a dry and weary land

where there is no water.

I have seen you in the sanctuary

and beheld your power and your glory.

Because your love is better than life,

my lips will glorify you.

I will praise you as long as I live,

and in your name I will lift up my hands.

My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods;

with singing lips my mouth will praise you.

On my bed I remember you;

I think of you through the watches of the night.

Because you are my help,

I sing in the shadow of your wings.

My soul clings to you;

your right hand upholds me.

Praise God!

Praising God for His faithfulness and provision of strength this weekend. It felt so intentional thinking about all this ahead of time and "planning for trials". It was awesome as I was able to be more on guard against temptation and stay within 0-5 eating despite challenges. And, as Heidi pointed out in one of her comments, it builds confidence in me for future trials.

So, for those who didn't read my updates on my food log I'll give a summary of how things went.

Friday - Dinner at Mom & Dad's
I went into it very mindful of conscious eating and planning for trials. I was very hungry and ready to eat when I got to my parent's place. I took small servings, but should really have taken even smaller ones as I feel awkward leaving food on my plate at their place. I slid the other 1/2 of my meatball over to my husband when my mom wasn't looking! *lol* I noticed my mom took note of how little I was taking...not sure if she thinks I didn't like her food or if she thought I was eating too little... (I made sure to profusely thank her for the meal and told her how delicious it was) Then when it was dessert time I made sure to have a wonderful mug of hot mint tea along with the chocolate pudding pie and savoured each and every bite of my small slice. My mom sent some of the pudding pie home with us, but I resisted temptation and didn't eat it. I felt completely satisfied after our family dinner. Praise God for this answered prayer!

Saturday - 12th Anniversary Celebration
Well, first of all our anniversary isn't until June 1st technically, but we wanted to go on a date to celebrate so this was the best possible time for our date. What a day! I was hungry so many times it was almost annoying! Imagine that! Being annoyed with being hungry *lol*! Thanks to God for helping me prepare for this "trial". I don't really like calling this weekend a "trial" as it really is all pleasant friend/family oriented activities, but I do know that each of these occasions presents challenges to 0-5 eating which are hurdles I am working on overcoming in God's strength.

So, what can I say about tonight.... Went bike riding with Jon for our anniversary date. What fun we had and my heart was just soaring with praise to God for a wonderful husband (who I had a lot of fun with!) and for His beautiful creation. I seriously felt overwhelmed with gratitude.

Then we stopped midway through for supper at a little fish & chips restaurant. Very neat little restaurant. The servings were fairly large so I right aways dumped over half my plate of food on Jon's plate....maybe will need to change this as the poor guy has a hard time not finishing up the food on his plate. I don't think it would have worked to take food home today as we were biking and the food wouldn't have stayed cool.

I was very present for the eating and really practiced conscious eating. Then we stopped for dessert another part way through our bike ride and had some ice cream. I seriously thought I could have eaten a few cones of ice cream... People around looked at them and would say "wow, that's huge!" and I kept thinking, "I could easily eat all that plus a few more." Then I watched the slim people around me and saw what they were ordering and thought "this is what I need to become more like. I need to become more content with smaller servings and just really savour it and not be greedy for too much." So I ordered a small cone . And I relished and enjoyed it:-) It was plenty, I felt comfortable and satisfied and very pleased to be within 0-5 eating.

I really feel convicted of the need to re-adjust my appetite for food. I need to be content with less. I need to view food as a naturally thin person does. As Heidi so wisely pointed out, I need to find other non-food treats in life. I shouldn't be expecting ice cream to be the ultimate treat. Eating outside of 0-5 does not fulfill and leaves a trail of brokeness and extra weight. So I'll be looking to God to grow more in this area.

Sunday - Church Potluck
I went into the meal very hungry which was positive to begin with. I took a small portion of food and was "present" and "conscious" for the entire meal. I made brownies in advance and set aside four small pieces for a later dessert (one slice for each of us). I thought this would help me resist eating any sweets at the luncheon....which it did. I didn't feel deprived of desserts, even though everyone around me was eating desserts. I just knew I'd have my dessert (that I'd set aside) at a more appropriate time.

Sunday - Dinner with Friends
Then we went to a friend's place for dinner...and I was hungry for that too, praise God! I was once again focussing on conscious eating and enjoying the company of friends. It was a wonderful meal, delicious food (that probably tasted all that much better because I was so present while eating plus was hungry to begin with), and also such a blessed time with friends as we shared from each other's hearts and prayed together. Thanks God.

The friend I was visitting happens to be the lady who is my "naturally thin eater" mentor. I have often observed her natural approach towards food. She never counts calories (and seems actually quite opposed to that or any other kind of diet mentality!), eats a balanced diet including sweet treats and coffee with those yummy flavored creamers. I was watching her a bit more closely tonight to see how she was eating. It's interesting how naturally it just seems to flow for her. It's interesting how it is so evident food doesn't hold any mastery over her.

In conclusion, PRAISE GOD! What more can I say! And thanks to those who remembered me in prayer. I'd love to do the same for you!

Taking Action, Planning Ahead

First of all, praise God for another pound released! Yippee!! I'm at 161lbs now. I really have faith that in a few more days I will be 159/160lbs...I had a feeling that a few more pounds were being released this week. My body just seems to function that way...maintaining for a couple weeks and then releasing 2-3lbs. Kind of weird how that works! I've noticed that other years as well.

Second, I think I need to get my head wrapped around this weekend as I know there are going to be some "trials." These trials are not going to be bad things, but rather I just know I will be tempted to get off track with 0-5 eating... So, I need to take action on my "planning for trials" exercise. I'm going to PLAN ahead right now!

Friday Night - Dinner at Mom & Dad's
Friday night is dinner at my parent's place to celebrate my brother's birthday. I know it will be more challenging to stay on track and stop at #5 with all my mom's good cooking and then a birthday cake to follow. My plan will be first of all to be good and hungry for supper. Next, I will make sure I am eating SLOWLY, savouring each bite, put down my fork between bites and converse with my family, take lots of sips of water between bites and then try to just be satisfied with a small piece of cake (this will be the toughest part for me I'm sure).

Saturday - 12th Anniversary Celebration
Saturday is a bit up in the air. But the plan right now is to do something with my husband to celebrate our 12th anniversary. So, our original plan was to go biking (about 1-3 hour bike ride) and then have dinner out and then ice cream for dessert (since that is our favorite treat). However, the weather is not looking particularily conducive now (rain in the forecast), so it may just be going out for dinner. Soooo, in that case scenario, I once again will need to be really hungry for dinner. And then I will aim to eat only a small portion of my meal and take home the leftovers to enjoy later...and save some room for a small portion of ice cream as I did last night when I went out with my friend.

Sunday - Church Potluck
Sunday is a potluck lunch at church. I think it is just sandwiches so the temptation should be manageable. I will just keep what I eat to the minimum and try to avoid desserts (maybe just have one small treat) as I know that is where I begin to slide down the slippery slope. Maybe I'll bring some sliced watermelon to the potluck. (if anyone has been reading my food logs you will probably notice how much I LOVE watermelon lol:-) The toughest part of my day will likely be at suppertime which I may not be hungry for. I will aim to play those songs I picked out in dealing with temptation. Prayer, bible reading, getting busy with something else etc.

So, in a nutshell it looks like each day I will need to be on guard against giving into temptation. I will be in prayer this weekend. I know this is just real life and I am not stressed about any of this as each of these events are positive, family/friend focussed. I just know that I need to be thinking ahead to the kind of mindset I will enter into each of these circumstances with, equipped with the tools I need to stay on track, with my eyes on the "exit" that God provides. And I know I need the Lord to work in my heart to ensure I am enjoying the food but most of all loving HIM!

Dear Lord, I praise you and thank you for friends and family and all the blessings you have poured out in my life. I pray that I would live in surrender to you each moment of each day-each choice, each step, each chain, each word, each prayer. I pray this weekend that I would keep pressing on and keep offering you every area of my heart and life. I pray for your strength to withstand temptations this weekend. I pray that you would draw my attention to the way out of each temptation. I pray that I would be sensitive to your Holy Spirit's prompting. Thank you for hearing my call. Thank you for beginning to heal and restore me. In Jesus name, Amen

Planning for Trials

Today I was reading TW chapter 8 and thought it would serve as a good reminder to me to do the planning for trials exercise again. I know I’ve covered some of this in previous posts, so it may not be of interest to you, but I know it is a good reminder to me as this is the nitty-gritty of TW for me, what sets me off 0-5 eating on a consistent basis.

A long time ago I talked with my daughters about dealing with temptation (at the time it was dealing with wanting to gossip about a kid in class). I mentioned how God provides us with an "exit" door (hence the graphics below!). Now my 6 yr old, whenever she is feeling very frustrated and can't get out of an emotional rut she is in, says "I can't find the exit!" Then we usually pray together and sure enough she finds the "exit" that God has provided....and we together we praise God for it.

"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out [also known as the EXIT in our household!] so that you can stand up under it." 1 Corinthians 10:13

So, now here I am thinking ahead to where the exit may be or how to get to the point where I choose to actually use the exit that God always faithfully provides.

I bake, I eat—taste test trap…and often the trap continues to lure me if it is a sugary treat. Often the temptation is to finish up the tempting food so it won’t be there to tempt me anymore.
First and foremost, I plan on really limiting the baking I do, keeping it more for special occasions. The next thing I plan on baking is going to be a banana bread loaf as I have some really ripe bananas right now. My goal will be to pre-slice the loaf and bag each piece, probably freeze the majority of the pieces (out of sight, out of mind does tend to be true for me generally). Thirdly, for those times that I am being tempted to eat outside of 0-5 with these tempting treats, I know it would be beneficial to move to another room, spend some time in prayer and bible reading (be still before God and really “practice His presence”). I’m just thinking right now another idea may be to find a really catchy encouraging God-focussed song and put it on every time I’m tempted. I kind of like that idea! I think I’ll try that one next time. Anyone have ideas for songs that may fit the bill? I’ll keep you updated on that idea!

I don’t want to wait for hunger. I want what I want NOW! The food is calling my name. I want to eat it ALL (past #5)! Etc…
This one is probably one of the hardest ones for me to deal with. These are the times when I have a voice in my head that says “you shouldn’t be eating it, you know you’re not hungry/or when you’re full” and then it’s like I just tell that voice (the Holy Spirit I’m guessing!) “be quiet, don’t think about it, it’s just this one time” etc. These are the times that I probably need to especially work on as this is a rebellious attitude that runs contrary to my godly goals.

So, what do I do??? First I think I’ll try that music idea again. We’ll see if that works, as I associate a certain song with acting as the escape route provided by God. Second, I should probably make sure these times I spend at least a couple minutes far away from the temptation in prayer/bible to get my focus back on God not on self. Third, get busy with something of interest—go for a walk, have a shower (even if it is at an odd time of day!), read story to the kids, run to the computer, play the piano, clean up the house, read a magazine… Many options are available if I just move away from the present weak moment.

It’s mealtime.
Breakfast and lunch are always pretty relaxed around our house, so no real stress over that meal. However, the supper meal is always tough for me. It is important to me to be hungry for this meal. I think it is good to eat well-rounded meals (as long as within 0-5 of course). It sends a good message to my kids to eat these healthy meals, conversing and eating…of course 0-5. So I do value being at #0 for supper. However, in the learning stages, I know that won’t always happen… If this is the case, my primary plan will be to sit down with the family and drink some water or some herbal tea and just visit. If this is too tough, I’ll do a little TW reading on the computer while the family eats…or start cleaning up the kitchen if it is a mess.

Social events.
The main thing is just to make sure I’m planning ahead to be hungry for the event. If I’m hungry then the only thing I need to focus on is really being conscious and present for the eating as well as focussing on the conversation and company around me. If I’m not hungry I think I could generally get by with just a non-caloric drink without offending anyone or anyone really thinking much of it.

Another huge one is when I’m tired and need a pick-me-up.
This is a really tough one as I wrote about the other day. As I wrote previously, hosting company sends me to after-dinner treats often. The key is to be really conscious and present for the eating and also enjoy the company. Also, not letting myself get too worn out with preparations is probably key too. There are lots of other times that I get tired though. I often just feel worn out and feel like eating for that extra energy boost. I think at times like this I should just lie down on the couch and close my eyes and be still before God. Drinking some water may also help. If it works to nap, I should definitely take that time to nap. I’ve been working on this area for quite some time, as this one became a very evident problem for me back when I first started TW. My husband actually was the one who brought up that I should take note of this weak time. So, I’ve been more vigilant with this particular area.

Anyone have any other ideas? I’m up for suggestions!

Thin Again - ch 4 Questions

Chapter 4:
Conscious Eating Not Compulsive Eating

What does the word “deliver” mean?
a rescue from the power of.

What does the word “freedom” mean?
God rescues us from the things that prevent us from living by faith.

What is “fat machinery”?
Anything that makes you eat when you’re not at “0”. I think of it as triggers. Ones that the author pinpoints are: conditioned and habitual responses, old unworkable beliefs, scales, past experiences and failures.

List any fat machinery that may have contributed to your disordered eating.

1. I bake, I eat—taste test trap…and often the trap continues to lure me if it is a sugary treat.
2. I’ve got to finish up this tempting food item so I’m not going to be tempted by it anymore.
3. It’s mealtime.
I enjoy food a lot and relish hot items hot out of the oven. To wait often means settling for less tasty food. I find baked items continue to tempt me when they are in the house as I have quite a sweet tooth.

4. I’m already off track so it’s license to stay off track!
5. I have failed so often, I will probably fail again.
This one has plagued me over and over again. It’s all about each moment and each choice.

6. Social events.
When it comes to social events I just let my guard down and find it hard to focus on the other, more important, reasons (other then food) for the social time.

7. I don’t want to wait for hunger.
Greed once again at the heart of the matter. Also, at times there are practical reasons. I find those a bit more tricky to deal with.

8. I’m tired and need a pick-me-up.
When I’m tired I find that I figure food will give me that extra energy boost I need….it often does. Eating after hosting company is another thing I’ve been in the habit of. I tend to not enjoy my food as much when I’m hosting (as I focus on all the details and on the company), plus I’ve usually made something extra tasty and sweet, so after company leaves I often just want to relax, kick up my feet and have that one last little treat.

What is true hunger?
“True hunger is a physical sensation in the body caused by the need for food.” TA pg 71

This link describes hunger quite well. I also liked this quick summary of the Weigh Down book's eating when you're hungry approach.

What is appetite?
“Appetite is a habitual desire for some gratification, either of the body or the mind, that food won’t satisfy even though we think it will.” TA pg. 71

How has your bathroom scale been part of your fat machinery?
“What happens when you wake up in the morning, step onto the bathroom scale, and see (arghhh!) that you’ve gained two pounds? You decide that your current efforts to lose weight aren’t working, so in your frustration what do you want to do? EAT! And what happens when you step onto the bathroom scale and see (yeah!) that you’ve “lost” a few pounds? What do you want to do? EAT! You decide to celebrate your victory with a hot fudge sundae, right? Either way the act of weighing has not served you.” TA pg. 74

This describes what I’ve experienced quite thoroughly. At times I can detach myself from the mastery of the scale in these instances and allow it to simply be a feedback tool, but at other times it simply does exactly as described above. It is a fine balancing act for me. I would like it if the scale would have no power over me. At this point in my journey I’m concentrating on the 0-5 eating being “scale”.

Write your understanding of the grace principle of observation and correction.
I simply acknowledge and note when I have made a choice that works contrary to 0-5 eating. I try to take note what I did and why I did it. This is my way of acknowledging before God that I have not been obedient and say “sorry”.

Correction (which I haven’t noted as much as observations) is what I can do different next time so I don’t make the same mistake again. It essentially is the conclusion of “sorry” as I repent and turn away… I think it is time to take note of corrections more often so I can change and grow more.

“A grace-oriented approach allows us to observe our behavior and correct it when we recognize that it does not serve our goals or God’s purpose for us.” TA pg 79

"Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat." F. Scott Fizgerald

MARCH - TW ch 25

March 25th food log:

Well, I must say I’m disappointed that I wasn’t hungry for supper yesterday. I was so close to rumbling, but don’t want to lie to myself (or others) and say I was truly hungry. I want to be as authentic as possible on this journey.

Chapter 25 was a very interesting read. I found it very practical and in many ways I’ve already dealt with a lot of these situations/circumstances….although I really liked the “spin” the author puts on these circumstances asking what the main purpose of these social occasions or family meals etc. is really about.
· satisfying hunger
· conversation
· convenience
· together time
· learning proper table etiquette
· making new acquaintances
· fun
· business contacts
· eat the food because the chef is excellent

“It may be helpful to take a personal inventory prior to attending a social occasion. Pray for wisdom, then ask yourself, ‘Why am I going to this particular event and what do I hope to gain from it?’ It’s doubtful that your answer will be ‘I want to overeat.’” P.270

MARCH - TW ch 8

March 8th:

Yeah! I had a full day of 0-5 eating! The last two days of reading have just really drove home to me what TW is all about. I have come to the conclusion I really wasn’t following much of TW at all the past month. I was following some hunger/fullness but not really applying all the concepts that TW has to offer. I’m feeling SOOOO excited again! I remember all the “aha” moments in November as I read the book daily. I’m back there again and learning so much about myself and really know this is the place to be! Praise God! I’m feeling very thankful!

What a powerful quote on p. 75 “As we surrender our hearts fully to His Spirit, we continue now to build in the strength of the Lord. He knows our hearts. He wants to give us His strength and He doesn’t expect us to succeed apart from Him.” I find this very encouraging!

Also, the verse in 2 Cor. 10:5 “we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ” resonates with me too.

Some of my answers I could relate to (from the list of beliefs about food/eating/weight that participants had shared on p. 78):
* Chocolate makes me feel better.
* Once I eat one potato chip (or in my case one bite of cookie etc.) I won’t be able to stop.
* I always gain weight during the holidays.
* Losing weight is so difficult.
* I always gain weight back after I lose it.

Now the exercise the REALLY excited me the most today was the Planning for Trials Exercise. I think it is an AWESOME exercise that actually makes me feel quite empowered. I was talking with my husband, Jon, last night saying how it just feels like this whole weight issue/food has mastery over me and I know God wants nothing to master me except HIM! So, it is a challenge for me to find ways to deal with temptation. So, here are my answers to the "Planning for Trials Exercise" pg 81:

Trigger: Supper is ready, but I’m not hungry yet.
Emotions: I feel impatient, the pull of food is like a magnet.
Godly strategy: I could go to my BR (far away from the dinner table) and pray, do devos. Another option would be to have a cup of herbal tea and sit at the table and visit with the family.

Trigger: Eating out at a restaurant.
Emotions: I feel like I must clean my plate to get my $$’s worth.
Godly strategy: Eat only half the amount, eat the best parts! Pack the leftovers of course.

Trigger: Offered something when I’m not at “0”.
Emotions: I feel the magnetism toward food and also guilt if I say “no”.
Godly strategy: Just say “NO thank you!!!!”

Trigger: After company I usually dig into another helping of dessert in front of the TV.
Emotions: I feel the magnetism, the greed for food and very tired out wanting to relax.
Godly strategy: A better response would probably be to have a bath and relax and pray there….or have a herbal tea in front of the TV.

Trigger: Baked goodies are calling my name for a taste-test.
Emotions: I feel greed, impatience (“I want it NOW!”).
Godly strategy: I should leave the room, go to BR and spend tiem in prayer. Wait for “0”.

Trigger: I want to eat it ALL!!
Emotions: I feel GREEDY!!!
Godly strategy: I should leave the room, go to BR and spend tiem in prayer. Wait for “0”.

Trigger: I am tired out and just want to eat to get some extra energy or to just move on with the day.
Emotions: I feel tiredness, grumpiness, impatience.
Godly strategy: I think a better response would be for me to have a bath or to have a nap to rest up. Or just have a little tea to get me by….I’m taking to herbal teas as you can tell!