The Lord's Table~Day 10, 11, 12

The Lord has certainly been impressing on me a need for a 180 degree turn back to Him, one of TRUE REPENTANCE. I think up until now I have only done a 90 degree turn. I haven't completely turned from the sin of greed and gluttony. I don't yet hate the sin. My prayer is that this turn would be made complete and that God would grant me the gift of repentance.



Day 10~More Living Water

This lesson highlighted that I need to switch water sources. God offers us Living Water, Christ Himself, who springs up and is truly satisfying. Too often I turn to a water source that is like a broken cistern and a dirty yucky sewer water source.

Here are a couple quotes from today's lesson that stood out to me:

Turning to overeating is like trying to get water from a jar with holes in it. TLT workbook pg 32

Course member Pam writes: "I can't just cut back on food but must
actively find my satisfaction in Christ." TLT pg 34

I can see that I have cut back on food but haven't actively found my satisfaction in Christ when the going gets tough! I haven't yet filled up the empty places with Him. I haven't actively looked to Him when I have felt tempted...and therefore have failed time and time again in the midst of temptations.


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Day 11~Turning

Repentance has often been described as doing a 180 degree turn, meaning we turn away from sin and turn to God... True repentance is not only turning from sin, it is turning to God and loving and serving
Him. TLT workbook pg35

Some verses that stuck out...

Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. James 4:7-10

Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.
Let the wicked forsake his way
and the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.
Isaiah 55:6-7

With gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of truth. 2 Timothy 2: 25, 26

Based on Isaiah 55 there are lots of ways I can actively find satisfaction in Christ and do that 180 degree turn: I am to seek the Lord, call upon Him, forsake sin and return to God. I do not feel I have forsaken sin. I still have my hand in the cookie jar....literally....okay, maybe the jelly bean container and chocolate tins in our house! I am praying that God would grant me the gift of repentance.


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Day 12~Repentance Brings Refreshment

"Even now," declares the LORD,
"return to me with all your heart,
with fasting and weeping and mourning."
Rend your heart and not your garments.
Return to the LORD your God,
for he is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and abounding in love,
and he relents from sending calamity.
Who knows? He may turn and have pity
and leave behind a blessing—
grain offerings and drink offerings
for the LORD your God.
Joel 2:12-14

I desire to have genuine repentance. I want to fast and weep and mourn and have my heart pierced with the sin of my rebellion and greed.

Overeating is when we gratify the cravings of the flesh rather than crucify them. This is sin. However, we are not at all saying that it is
sin to eat when hungry. What we are talking about here, gluttony, is the habit of overeating and indulging our flesh, not the necessary requirement of daily nourishing our bodies when we feel hungry. TLT workbook pg 39

I desire to crucify the cravings of the flesh, rather then having them master me.

I make exceptions for eating all the time. Even yesterday I felt a sense of conviction that God was calling me to loosen the grip of sugar in my life, calling me to fast from it....and I didn't follow through. How sad. This reflects to me that I have not fully turned and forsaken sin and seen the yuckiness of my sin.

God has been hitting me left right and center with this whole repentance and living water teaching as I'm getting it from this week's lessons in TLT along with the Breaking Free studies along with personal conviction and scripture that God brings to mind. Interesting how God works isn't it!

Our insatiable need or craving for too much of anything is symptomatic of unmet needs or what we called "empty places. Salvation does not equal satisfaction. (You can be saved and still be dissatisfied.) Satisfaction comes when every empty place is filled with the fullness of Christ. While salvation comes to us as a gift of God, we find satisfaction in Him as we deliberately surrender all parts of our lives. Breaking Free workbook by Beth Moore pg 168

As I read this I wondered WHAT ARE MY EMPTY PLACES? I don't even know the answer to this. I'm asking God to reveal this to me. Why on earth am I drawn to sugar the way I am? Why do I ever eat past satisfaction? It just doesn't seem to make sense! I just keep going and going even when I hear the Spirit convicting me otherwise.

Here's another great quote from today's Breaking Free lesson...

The fullness of God is not a one-time occurrence like our salvation.
Every day of our lives--to live victoriously--we must learn to pour out our hearts to God, confess sin daily so nothing will hinder Him, acknowledge every hollow place, and invite Him to fill us fully! Then we need to continue to fan the flame of His love by reading Scripture, listening to edifying music, and praying often. Breaking Free workbook by Beth Moore pg 171

Dear Lord, I pray that you would convict me of the seriousness and yuckiness of sin, in particular gluttony. I pray that you would grant me the gift of repentance. I truly don't want anything to hinder You from working in and through me. I pray that you would reveal to me every hollow, empty place in my heart and life. I pray that I would do that 180 degree turn and actually fill up on Living Water. I pray that you would guide me in this journey and may Your Holy spirit transform me each and every day to be more and more like You. In Jesus name, amen.