FEBRUARY - Getting started!

Getting started following "Thin Within" by Judy & Arthur Halliday

I have been keeping a journal since I started this journey and will try to catch up to where I am today in my journey!

February 3rd:
Well, I am determined this is it. I want to lose this weight once and for all. I am sickened by my greed for food, the power/mastery that food has in my life and the lack of self-discipline I have. I know and believe God can do miracles and by His Holy Spirit change me from the inside out. I want to surrender to Him. My goal is to keep a daily journal in this folder to be a reminder for myself in my journey, and also help me keep a degree of accountability with others. My present goal in terms of food records is to have a record of my eating right on my fridge (in plain view of my husband). I know this has helped me in the past, keeping track of whether I'm hungry or not at each eating occasion along with whether or not I have exercised. I want to get back to this. Also, I really want to have a more balanced diet and want to make sure each eating occasion has more value. A verse that really has spoken to me is:

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God."
1 Corinthians 10:31

What does it mean "for the glory of God"? I think it means that even in the most simple, daily tasks/goings-on God wants us to glorify Him.....and I think the way I can do this is being obedient to Him. God has impressed on me that obedience is reflected in:

1.) following hunger/fullness cues that He has gifted me with
2.) making wiser more balanced food choices.

Ultimately that means not allowing anything to master me but Christ.....and I know that my greed for certain foods, particularily sugary ones, or even just ANY food when I'm not hungry DOES at times does take a higher place then Christ and master me. I want this to change in my life.

February 4th:
Well, today was a start….not a perfect start, but a start all the same! And I don’t feel too discouraged. I know it always takes a bit to really consistently wait for hunger… A couple things I liked about the way the day went. First, I felt like I ate so much healthier. I enjoyed the foods I ate. I felt I paid fairly good attention to the food/pace I was eating. And I was pleased that I waited for hunger in the morning. That’s not always an easy thing to do.

February 5th:
Today went fairly well. Still ate a bit more in one sitting then I should have, but I think it all worked out.

February 6th:
Well, today was a difficult day for me as I was completely low on energy and tired as I’d been up all night with my sick daughter. I started the day working on just a little bit of sleep. This is always my weakest point for overeating I find. I didn’t wait for hunger for the majority of the day, but was thankful (and surprised) when I got hungry at suppertime. This was very encouraging to me. I made healthy choices for the most part though. And I didn’t eat past a #5 (with the exception of supper). So, that was good too.

February 7th:
Tuesday has been my best day so far… Anyways, I really feel pleased that I have been continuing to make healthy food choices. That’s a step in the right direction.

February 9th - 11th:
Well, so far this week has gone really BAD! I have not been on track at all! But I am going to keep plugging away. I think one of the keys to my failure is weekend laziness or out of routine issues. My other big downfall is definitely when I bake. I love to bake though and am not sure how to manage this one and eat in moderation. I know I have to figure this one out though. The clincher this weekend was a chocolate cake I baked, and then came the buns and then came the banana bread and then the sugar cookies... Once I`m off track it`s REALLY hard to get back on. Anyways, I know the Lord forgives and desires me to keep plugging away! Not giving up here! It`s just one bad week! I`ve got lots more good ones to come.

February 14th:
Well, that doesn’t look like a very good eating day! Anyways, it was a special day and kind of hard to be on track, particularily since I didn’t start the day hungry. Would have helped to have been hungry for breakfast!

February 17th:
I stepped on the scale and was mortified to see 173lbs! Ugh! What is going on! I just can’t seem to get things back on track… Feels like a useless battle at times…. Sigh

February 19th:
That brings me to Tuesday… I stepped on the scale this morning and was 171lbs. Quite discouraging actually. I know I’m not in the “zone” yet. Anyways, I was hungry earlier then usual this morning which was encouraging. I ended up rumbling at 8am which is great. I had a small bowl of cereal. I also did my cardio of 20 minutes jump rope (do 1200 jumps) .

Well, I’m really thankful for how the day went. Yeah, each day I followed my hunger and fullness! That feels REALLY good! I don’t know when the last time was that I did that….probably not since November. Praise God for this small victory! My plan is to fast tomorrow until supper as it is our churches’ day of fasting and prayer. So, I’m guessing I’ll have another day “on the wagon”!

February 20th:
Well today was a day of fasting and prayer….so eating wasn’t really an issue! What an awesome day of time spent with the Lord it was! And in the evening I had such a wonderful bible study with two new believers. It was all about God’s character being the foundation of our faith. I knew it was going to be a pretty big study for these ladies and God has been speaking in so many different ways on this topic to me—through Sunday morning sermon, through both bible study guides I’m working through etc…..all in one week! It was really awesome to unpack it with these ladies and I know that the time of prayer and fasting was used by God to help focus my prayer for this study. So PTL!

I rumbled MANY times throughout the day, starting at 8:30am . Pretty much rumbled every 2 hours through the day…..interesting observation I must say! Something for me to remember in the future. I also got my cardio in today, skipping rope for my regular 20 minutes (1200 jumps). So, that was good too.

February 21st:
I was determined to have another on-track day, so as I headed out to the school to volunteer I just brought along a yogurt and plastic spoon in case I got hungry. Didn’t end up eating it despite rumbling at 10:30am as it wasn’t convenient…

February 23rd:
I’m definitely disappointed with how today went. I started out the day with good intentions and did wait for hunger, but then as I did some experimental cooking I taste-tested food which kind of lead down a slippery slope.

I’m feeling a little anxious about tomorrow as meals are a bit more structured tomorrow….eating out for lunch and supper (not in a restaurant but elsewhere). So, it will be a little more difficult to time eating when I’m hungry. If I start out right, being hungry prior to lunch I should be okay. I know that hot dog, chips and juice are on the menu for lunch….so I’ll try to keep the amount down, maybe skip the chips and aim for ½ the hot dog. We’ll see. Then in the evening it’s a potluck at church….that one will be a little more difficult to control the amount of food. I will need to be very careful tomorrow to make sure this weekend doesn’t turn into the same as last! My aim for weight by the end of next week is down to 167 lbs. Hopefully I’ll turn the corner on that and get back to that 165 lbs really soon, then start working on new weight to lose! Weight loss is SOOOO hard! It’s crazy!

February 23rd - 28th:
Not a very good week in regards to eating…..